the tears

my friend once described me this way "iman, i think u can only cry during watching dorama. when is the other time do u actually cry?"

today, i could not stop the tears. they just flowed. oh, i did not watch dorama.

ever since i got the wake-up call following the cruel attack on gaza, my input increase from day to day. i admit now sometimes, i even turn my head whenever i saw newspaper. i can't stand to see such cruelty done to my muslim brothers and sisters, automatically those cursing words would blurt out from my mouth. who wouldn't? just where do they throw away their conscience, to even kill children and women, let alone the fighters who are only endeavouring to take back what had been confiscated forcefully from them-and this is what they call terrorist?

today, i watched a palestinian girl deliver a poem. compared to numerous pictures and article i confront(gosh, i'm lost with vocab now) before, this one really and deeply moved my heart. thanks to the english subtitle available, i could understand what she's feeling. her voice resonates in my ears, portraying such sufferings i could never imagine. before she actually cried in the middle of the poem, tears trickled down my cheek first. i studied arabic back in the past and listeningto her while catching some of it makes me my heart break even more.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8LZpaIKLw0Y&eurl=http://palestinkini.info/&feature=player_embedded

and after that, i read an article which made the tears continued rolling down. they actually mercilessly bombed a 4yr-old child while he is playing, blocking his parents effort to save him with bullet shoots. it does not stop there. even when the child's dead, they didn't even permit the family to retrieve the lifeless body, continued to release bullet whenever anyone dared to come close. FOR 5 DAYS in which period, they let dogs to savour the child's meat until barely are left sticking to the bone. finally, the child's brother risk their life in getting what's left of their brother and lost their lives. source :http://palestinkini.info/?p=3047

so, when i knew myself is not well-informed of the situation there, the reasons, the history and the unconcealed truth behind this conflict, i tried to find as many info i could. fortunately, when i was searching my campus' library for materials of my assignment, i came across a book revolving on the issue. "peluru lawan batu" by maszlee malik. still in the middle of reading through it and i'm glad i found it. the answers to my confusion are clearly explained here. the conflict has not just started recently, it goes way back decades ago and this is what people have to know, not to just depend on informations wrongly and falsely or just partially reported on some media hindering you to get in touch with the whole truth. in fact, i was shocked to discover someone i know giving such account that does not stand back to the complete history itself, thus believing easily on the incomplete picture of the situation. it just means that u can't wholly depend on materials in your quick reach(the media for instance-they know they have the power to influence people's belief) to understand the whole matter. if you really want to what actually happen, you have to search it by yourself, find lots of info and only then you're allowed to judge the situation.

so, please, i appeal to all of you. before you make any judgement, please thoroughly know what you are judging. don;t blindly do it as you could be unfair in doing so. i, myself is a weak person, who prefer to lead life easy but once we ignore this, by simply believing in things without researching into it, someone would suffer. yes, it's a bother to do all that, but its importance is undeniable. not just in this case, in any affair too.