foliage

honestly i am super duper easily distracted

like this very action of me writing here in the blog itself is a distraction.

i don't wanna mention what i'm supposed to do, but now i'm distracted, let's just get into it.

at least i'm writing something.

so recounting what i had recently, we had kouyou trip to nikko!

kouyou = foliage. that's what i found from the dictionary.

in short, when people say they are going for 'kouyou', it means they're going to enjoy the awesome view of leaves in orange and red when fall has come.

since it was late october, the best place was apparently Nikko, a place located in Tochigi prefecture, about 2-3 hours drive from here.

2~3 hours when the traffic is normal.

but of course, it's the peak season, just imagining the traffic jam is enough to make you feel tired.

we departed at about half past 9 from saitama, at about noon we exit the highway and entered Nikko, but to reach our destination, Chuuzenji Lake, that took us another hour or so. just that short distance of few kilometers to get over this one mountain!

we made it at the lake and it was already past 2pm. less than 3 hours left before the the sun would set.

the first view i could get after finally getting out of the car, finding the carpark was quite a deal

Chuuzenji Lake

The shops that lined the road by the lake

Isn't this stunning!

Just me getting all hyped in front of camera

all the leaves have turned red

the fallen ones

i like this lane

Look up and this is above me

The trees that lined the road

Actually this is road going into a jinja

Yellow and Red, my camera color balance seems weird here.

and the boys

So yeah, we still managed to enjoy kouyou. As it turned dark, it was getting really cold, thankfully we had quite a dinner of Naans and lots of chickens in a buffet restaurant. We spent really long time there, maybe the owner already felt we were quite a nuisance. but well, everything went well.

人見知り

this is gonna be a depressing entry...



this is not exactly a recent thing, but lately i'm being reminded how inept i am

socially.

though i think some people may see me as an extrovert person.

and when i'm racking my brain to get over this, i keep searching of the reason why.

oh, just why can't i just ask that person when i have something i don't know? i'm not even sure why, why is it so hard to muster the courage to voice out.

okay, a major turn off is when i foresee that even if i ask, the other person won't get what i say, and i won't get the answer i seek. or i am afraid of simply making a fool of myself.

and there is a chaos inside me with me condemning myself for not doing what i think is right, and the foolish pride justifying it.

i am such a coward.

i could not even be comfortable being among people i don't know.

without me realizing it, maybe it's me who build the walls around me.

and later feeling miserable all by myself.


and harder when i know, to overcome this, i have to do it on my own.

and i know, some people will only just say, just do it!

at times like this, 'ganbatte' is the last thing you wanna hear. in fact, it somehow sounds like a taunt instead of a word of encouragement.

3renkyuu again?

Not really, it's only me who decides so. A Friday that i love when sensei happens to be absent from the lab^^

So today i got a little errand to do a little bit before the evening. I promised to meet someone at Omiya station by 4:45pm

I finished my work at the lab and supposedly we had our weekly meeting at 4, but i reported my research progress earlier. My sensei is ok with that. Oh yeah, i really love him today, i felt bad for rushing him to do my reference letter for scholarship applications, nevertheless he did it nicely!

So i departed from school to the train station at about 4, by bicycle it would take about 10-15 mins. I got a lot of time in my hand.

I even brought a novel to kill time while waiting. And i carried it in my tote bag. How stupid of me to use tote bag to school today while i knew i'll be riding bicycle.

The thing is my dear bicycle is so sporty it has no basket to put stuff.

So i just hanged it at the handle, though i was afraid of it swaying and getting too close to the revolving front wheel.

Another bad choice today, pants with loose bottoms. It made me worried when it kept wanting to get stuck at the chains. it did slightly, with a bit of tear as a result.

But it seems that the main concern is not that.

When i didn't realize it, as i cycled, suddenly the front wheel stopped!

In a blink of an eye, i was on the ground. I imagined the back wheel must be jerked upwards, and the impact was great. That hurts soooo much!

It turned out that my bag got stuck at the wheel that initiated the sudden brake. Oh, my bag! and i really love that one, now it is stained with black oils or whatever dirt at the wheel.

Thankfully i didn't think anyone saw it, it must be funny. Fortunately no major wounds, just some light bruises and scratches.

But still, when I tried to ride the bicycle again, it was difficult. Ended up holding the bicycle and walked to the station. When i thought i would have a lot of time to spare.

Lucky i made it just in time at the promised time. So delighted the minor accident didn't make me late, or else my friend and I probably couldn't meet as she had to catch train quickly after that.

Now i'll just take a rest, and rest more tomorrow~~~



oops, tomorrow i still have to go take the bicycle i left at school.

showing off my beloved black bicycle

lackadaisical

i don't know why but i feel like i haven't given my best yet.

in a lot of things.

and when i realize it, it's already october.

like, what???

by the way, i finally finished reading this book that i bought 380 days ago.

yeah, it has been a languid year as well for my reading activities.

this is my 5th attempt to read japanese books, also my 5th book from Isaka Kotaro. so i can't really say he's my favourite author as i've never read works from other authors. This book was nice, it's a compilation of short stories, but they're related to each other as the setting is the same, only the character in each story is different. the scenario was that the world was about to end as meteorite was forecast to fall, and it is 2~3 years before predicted doomsday. all havoc and unrest has just calmed down after people seemed to be tired of it. like other of his books that i've read, the setting is Sendai, and the stories are told from the eye of residents of condo complex named Hillstown. each story has its own unique view, it's interesting to delve into various people's mind when confronted with the fact that world is going to end real soon.

hopefully the remaining days in this year will be filled with me feeling accomplished with a lot of things. i would hate it if 2012 just end with me being not so productive, that is so sad and a waste of my young age.

but, i did read manga though

thanks to my labmates who are loyal buyers of 'マガジン', i really appreciate it that i can read Kindaichi without having to wait for the tankoubon.

now i'll try reading the next book! commute time in trains is the best time to read them

subject of curiosity

so, it has been in my mind for a while.

number 1, this phrase:

'teman tapi mesra'

literally translated, 'companion, but intimate' (i don't know where's the need for me to translate this though, just that i'm writing in english, just let it be)

most probably it lies on how you define each word, but as weird as it is, is there anyone who have a companion but is not intimate? this is oxymoron. if some suspicious affair is to be pointed out, shouldn't it be like 'overly intimate companions', well you are free to think of anything then.


number 2, this still remains a mystery to me, typhoon no.17-Jelawat, who named it and how was it named that way, is it what i think it is, a fish?


number 3, why the hell when i'm writing in the internet, like in email, blogger or livejournal, there's no grammar check? like when i'm writing this, the first letter should be capital letter, and yes, i, can you please automatically turn that into capital letter. i am annoyed looking at it.

number 4, since when the domain of this blog has become .jp ?


by the way, how to erase that feeling of irritation whenever you spot any grammar mistakes when you read something? it's like i'm being made a fool of for studying grammar in school while people actually don't care. sometimes it irks me out even when reading my own writing, even something simple as wrong subject-verb agreement-this is the one i'm prone to the most. short form of a word is still understandable, but spelling mistake is another.

enough of me babbling for today, just suddenly my mood is back for blogging. (actually there were some drafts i wrote during months of my inactivity here, but they unfortunately remain as drafts)

1st day of final semester?

now i'm  in the mood of writing, i'll just continue.

yesterday was October 1st, when i'm typing this it's around 1am, so that was only like an hour ago? well, in my university calendar, it's the start of Semester 2 for 2012-2013 school year. somehow it feels different this time around.

first of all, after my retreat back at home, i immediately returned to the lab in early September and we were quite toiled (is this really for my case?) for Chuukan Happyou, a presentation on our research we were required to do as half of our 4th year has passed. so basically i was at school almost everyday because of that when everyone else were enjoying their summer holiday. the school was always empty, spare for some people especially with researches.

so today, when i went to school, actually today (i'm talking about yesterday) was unusual that i went really early as i misheard my sensei, i thought we would have meeting on that morning, it was a fine morning after the storm that hit kanto the previous day, the sky was so blue void of clouds. and then i witnessed a number of people in the school ground, with cheery atmosphere, well girls in short skirts looking cute and such. last time i bumped into a friend in school before the presentation, he was seriously lacking sleep, imagine a black atmosphere.

"Oh, today school starts!"

it took me a while to get used having a lot of people especially during lunch hours, it used to be quiet when i took the route at the main road in the campus, now it's bustling with people everywhere. but yeah, once i entered our building, things remain the same, gloomy and dark. entered my lab as usual but other members barely came. it came to my knowledge that today most companies hold their ceremonies for accepted employees, that may hold true for some in my lab. i did what i usually have to do, some checks on my research subject-the tomato, and then i got so much time to spare. i scanned through the application forms for scholarships i collected and noticed that one of them which deadline was on this very day!

i couldn't prepare for that in that instant! so i chose to read my manga instead. lucky there was Kindaichi manga that i bought but haven't read. actually it's a reissue for the one long ago, i couldn't remember much anyway, so it was like reading a new one. so i read and continued reading, seeing my lab members came and go. my professor came in and i told them that actually typhoon no.17 actually has a name-Jelawat which origin remains a subject of curiosity. he even invited us to attend his class which i happily don't take, i have my credits enough already, i'm free the whole semester except for my main obligation, that is my research. it was before noon when it struck me, maybe i could make it, filling in the forms and writing the things required. there were two essays we had to write in japanese, the reason i thought it was impossible for me. yet, my impulse said i should. to hand it in less than 5 hours when the form is as clean of any ink drop seemed like an intriguing idea. i did it anyway, sense of accomplishment washed over me at the end of the day

i gotta say, reading manga facilitated my brain in thinking in japanese, it was not as difficult as i thought. and recently when i resumed reading the short stories by Isaka Kotaro, that helps too. i recommend reading his works, they're interesting and easy to read. some examples of how interesting they are, movie adaptations from his work are real jewels. that was exactly how i got to be a fan of his, my favourite would be 'Ahiru to Kamo no Coin Locker'. i should read more now i find i have free time in between my tasks in lab. but yeah, being internet attached does not help at all. leaving my blog deserted and doing unsubstantial stuff most of the time. our generation is wrecked in a way.

so, my renewed resolution is doing more reading. maybe i should specify what is 'more', there should be a goal i can accomplish. i failed quite heavily the last half year, i didn't even get past one book! this is embarrassing, i'm turning 22 soon and i got a feeling my intellectual aspect has gone backwards, i won't allow that to happen.

i will read, i will write. i will speak. i will improve.




i will do my research properly ;D

btw, i cooked my own dinner the day before yesterday! that's a big achievement. well, naturally it became my dinner the next day, and probably lunch for another day though ~.~

where my money has gone wasted

and here i am wanting to write an entry even with another draft unposted.

but, this is among random things i'm thinking rather than account of events like usual post

so, yeah, let's go to the bulleted list

well, those that are wasted for practically nothing:

• attempted to start using softener when doing laundry, only to realize i've been using some really nice-fragrant DETERGENT as softener. so that was double dose for each laundry i've done in the last few months
• instead of cycling to the train station which costs nothing, i took the bus and then remembered that i forgot something at home, so another bus trip to return home and eventually decided to cycle to the station
• bought a pair ticket for an event wishing someone would be my company, but no one was available and went alone in the end
• took instant photo at the photo booth, inserted 1000yen bill and  forgot to take the 300yen change
• bought a cup of pudding as a reward for myself and put it in the refrigerator in lab to be eaten later but forget all about it
• once i went all the way to yokohama to have fun, said goodbye when it's late night. on the way return, i was supposed to change train at shibuya, but i already missed the last train to saitama, ended up going back to yokohama direction just in time for the last train and spent the night at a friend's.
• i think i already bought 2 cords to connect my macbook to my TV but none of them actually works
• having to buy umbrella each time rain pours when i forgot to bring mine in the first hand
• some pieces of clothes i thought i would wear but in the end i just don't
• a pair of really nice looking leather boots, but turned out to be pigskin
• i think i bought souvenirs more than needed, they ended up in my storage
• honestly i kinda regretted i chose to go to my lab's gasshuku this year where i didn't even enjoy
• sometimes food that i bought and then stored in the fridge/freezer ended up in garbage after a while passed
• once i foolishly bought an app in iPhone but then it proved to be useless and i deleted it on that very day
• having to pay redelivery fee for a package after i forgot to update my latest address in their system, and it happened not even once

and those that are guilty pleasures:

• trips to baskin robbins even on non-discount days. to have it in my proximity makes it irresistibly tempting
• frequent purchase of bar chocolates especially when the mood escalates
• being a member of a paid fanclub of a group i really like
• constant purchase of CDs and DVDs, even those including the live performances i actually went to
• yeah, those live performances and the goods that come with them (but they're worth it!)
• i actually have quite a number of bags in my possession
• buying manga that i actually have read

they amount to a big chunk of my expenditure. no wonder it makes me not so happy each time i check my bank account. hopefully nothing of these sort will happen again.

hopefully....