uneasiness

don't really know why, now, i'm feeling so uneasy

i'm escaping what i'm supposed to do, got the feeling that even if i do it, i can't concentrate much

what's this uneasiness anyway?

first, i'm worried about exam, but still i can't move much. is it due to such overwhelming anxiety?

2nd, this morning, we were given simple guidance on our course selection starting next sem. before, i'm determined but now i dunno.... mou mayotteita

3rd, i feel like i did something wrong but i can't trace what is it, can't even think of anything for the moment. oh please, people, just tell it straightforward (in a kind way) for anything u find unpleasing with me. if you don't tell, i'll never know, never have the chance to at least fix the situation. well, if you conceal it within urself just because for the sake of 'jaga hati' it'll end up hurting the other party for most of the time.


hate is a negative word
so, how should i describe how i feel towards my current self? loathe? despise? resent?



btw, the TAs are returning to japan tomorrow, hope they have safe journey home. it was fun having them here