Idealistic Mind of an Absolute Neurotic

winter makes me hungry

2012-01-27T21:13:00.003+09:00

it's a fact when your body is cold, your body will counteract with producing as much heat as needed, and even though your body has so many fat, there'll be signals sent to the brain telling it it needs more resources from outside, thus the hunger.

a hungry me is definitely not the best state. the thing is i admit i'm not a good cook, nor i like to cook in the first place. so i can hardly produce any food by myself. i have to get it somewhere. but, winter really is not my best friend. in fact, i dread it quite a bit. while most people i know would be so happy to see snow, i'll smirk. it's hard to move, it's cold. even to walk to the nearest 7-11 is quite a task. like today, i just had spaghetti as dinner (thankfully there's instant spaghetti sauce for people like me), yet i'm now hungry again.

one thing i hate to be in japan is the ambiguity of the ingredient listed. easier said, i'll just be a vegetarian here. i would avoid all the things with meat or animal extracts, and resort to seafood stuff and vegan. yet, for all the processed food available out there, the most problem i'll encounter is these two: 'emulsifier'(乳化剤) and 'shortening'. both of them can be originated from either plants or animal. emulsifier is called by that name due to its function which is to stabilize an emulsion by increasing its kinetic stability of a food. on the other hand, shortening is a substance that prevents cross-linkage between gluten molecules. the problem for me here is those two can either originate from plant (which is okay) or animal (which is definitely a no). i mean, what's the use of listing ingredient by its function? is there anyone who is interested to know there is a substance in the food that is doing what kind of job. what i want to know is what it is derived from. just why can't you write down specifically 'lard' or 'vegetable fat' instead of shortening, those two functions to prevent cross-linkage between gluten molecules (just copypasting the above). don't vegetarian people in japan be conscious of these stuff? or there's practically no vegetarian here. oh yeah, here is asia after all. animal-sourced stuff maybe is cheaper and more economic for food manufacturing, but please be detailed in disclosing the information.

and oh, my bad when i made a call to the manufacturer, to confirm whether there's any animal-sourced ingredients or not, apparently dairy stuff also considered animal. err, and then i don't know how to ask further. how can i exactly ask them, anyone can teach me the exact term for those?

but i wonder why in other places i've been (talking big as if i've traveled the whole world, yet the number of countries i've gone can even be counted by one hand), i never had to bother with these? i mean, these are the common substances used in food industry. is japan (the famous advanced country) is the only who uses animal-sourced subtances as emulsifier? you see, how awkward to not be able to buy bread? i assume at the moment fresh-baked stuff at bakeries is okay as it's less likely to have these subtances. or should i ask every single time, "does this bun has lard? does this one too?". okay, i know no other ingredients than lard that i shouldn't consume.

babi.

the above is the name of their main source of meat, favourite for most. (okay, honestly i just wanted to mencarut)

yes, i'm hungry. i need to drag my feet to 7-11 and get my favourite dango which cost 105yen, and a 1L pack of lipton milk tea (anyone wanna inform me the emulsifier in it is animal-sourced?? i don't know how many hundred of litres i've drank so far).

or maybe i won't after all, it's cold. i'd rather be in my futon. oh no, i should be studying coz i haven't started at all!

okay, otsukare to all who's already done, and ganbarou who still have papers coming. mine starts next week

p/s: feast to the eyes. another delicious food i got to relish last weekend. maguro saikou!!!

first post of 2012

2012-01-08T15:31:00.001+09:00

wow, i only had one entry for last month!

well, i tend to write long entries and when i couldn't finish it, it all get stuck in drafts.

in the end, i didn't even write an entry about the latter half of my summer vacation-sorry for those who anticipates it.

and now the semester nearly ends.

honestly, i don't think i'm doing good. i was even figuring out how exactly i survived the last semester. or specifically to remember that vigor to do things. i've lost it now.

okay, in return, i rigorously do something else completely unrelated to school. i'm sorry for myself.

that's all for i feel inside, i actually had been involved in stuff too lately.

i went to a programme in Zao Liza (pronounced as 'raiza') in Yamagata prefecture.

it was good that i went.

i got to experience snowboarding for the first time too.

that was during the short winter vacation i had. (thanks to the super long summer vacation, our winter vacation is cut short)

now it's over, the school is nearing the period we call final exam. while i'm still clueless what exactly i learnt in classes.

oh, quit that rants!

oh yea, before that trip, it was food haven for me~ for a few days straight, i could relish on delicious cuisines or simply food.

for how many times i lost count, i went to dohtonbori and eat okonomiyaki with my friends on the last day of school of the year. i already memorized the only several menu i could eat there, and i've eaten them all.

that next day, i was fortunate enough to be able to savor on delicious sushi! obviously there's a difference between kaitenzushi (the one that goes round the shop on revolving lanes) and the one that are not. thanks to a particular someone who kindly brought me there. i'm very grateful now. oh yea, we took purikura too.

and then the next day, it was a house party at jlo's. she and her housemates made chicken rice, a tasty one! and i met Heng-their junior, and the rest of the day was pure adventure, where it all decided at the spur of the moment. that was fun watching movie, eating ice-cream, taking purikura(now this is 2 days straight), and unexpectedly singing our heart out.

and then, the next day was sunday, christmas. as much i was puzzled as to how christmas is becoming significant to japanese although they're mostly atheist or buddhist/shinto, i still celebrate the day as holiday and i spent it with my girl friend eating cakes all we want. that was a lot of delicacies.

yeah, FOOD MAKES YOU HAPPY.

for some reason, i'm heavily attached to baskin robbin's ice-cream, during new year, i ate various types of them for 3 days consecutively. on jan 4th, i just couldn't continue as i had no money in my wallet.

oh yea, yesterday, i made nasi goreng. in my case, this is a big news! i really want to put the picture, but i'm now typing this from my main notebook, so lazy to transfer the photo from the phone

if only i got macbook, i could easily use it from the photostream.

i want a macbook <-- this is avarice. it's not like i don't have a functional computer to use (even though the monitor is not working)

i should save more money.

honestly, my head is thinking of more things to write. but i don't think it has any more relevance.

so, ciou.

before that, a feast to the eyes!

the sushi! (i wonder why i took from this angle, tamago is not my fav though)

p/s: i changed the look of the blog! somehow the previous one failed me, i really want a layout with snail on it >.<

.... (didn't even know i unposted this)

2011-12-20T02:09:00.000+09:00

The last time i wrote here was about a month ago, and just like then, i'm still on a rollercoaster of thoughts and emotions. And i could only laugh just like how i would when i ride the real rollercoaster.

I've been quite disappointed for quite a few things especially when it's regarding my own self. I'm questioning myself where had all the motivation gone and how to retrieve it, worried when i sense no crisis when i think i already should. I have no plan or whatsoever, and the things i'm doing at the present doesn't seem to be in good shapes, it makes my mental goes haywire. At times i took a breather, or should i say a lot of times? Well, they work as effective as placebo.

Okay, that's all for some soliloquy.

Now, i shall write by what's happening lately. I realized my english has gone worse when there's zero demand to use it here. In fact, japanese language has monopolized my language use including inside my head. I know i should do something when i start to have to translate things from japanese first in my head. As a countermeasure, i frequent the english lounge we have here a lot now. And i also took part in the lecturer's research which requires me to take ielts test, in the same time it enables me to know my current language ability. Well, the result significantly shows that i have a lot to improve. But surprisingly i did quite great in listening though i know that was certainly my weak point as i'm not exactly an auditory type of person. On another event but closely related, i was really at a loss for words when someone told me i exude good energy it made her feel good to be around, that was my first time to be told that, i don't know i should be flattered or what, i was simply astonished.

Moving on to another topic, i think i just managed to make miso soup! I'll try to make it again next time all by myself. I hope it'll turn out delicious like the one i made (supervised by my friend) the other day.

While writing this, i'm on a train heading to hachiouji as i'm having nothing to do after i forgot my reading materials at home. The heater located below the seat really makes my legs warm, in fact hot. i actually was (or still am) grouchy since the early morning, i keep listening to 2 songs in my ipod on repeat. As always, Solanin by Asian Kungfu Generation makes me calm. i also found DUGOUT by Radwimps to have a consoling effect too and made me curious with the lyrics as well. Usually Noda always amazes me with his words. I wish i have that kind of skill too, but maybe it's just because the way we think is different in the first place. Now that's something i can't really do anything about. Human minds are so wonderful just by the diverse ways it works by individuals, it makes the world so complex and colourful.

Okay i've been rambling randomly here. Now i just reached my destination, so Byebye

Sleepless in the futon

2011-11-15T20:18:00.003+09:00

It's nearly 8pm and i've curling myself for about 2 hours under the blanket. Really want to sleep after staying up all night last night. But i'm still not asleep.

It has been a while since i last wrote nothing particularly worthy here. So let me just recount what happened today.

In the morning, starting from 2nd period, i got class. The first one was applied fluid dynamic. I remembered the lecturer mentioned about sonic speed airplanes, then i got asleep for the rest of the class until my friend woke me up as i was nearly producing snoring sounds. I'm glad i got a kind friend at times like these. Then, after lunch break the 3rd period was material engineering. We were learning about material strenghtening. There was something molecular stuff mentioned, even into nanoscale. But as always i can only stand half the class before i run out of concentration and can no longer pay any attention. Yet, the class still goes on even when i secretly hope the lecturer would just pause and stop talking for a while. It kind of makes me sick. What's greater, next week we got a test. -.-

The final class i got was human interface where my 2 close buddies just decided not to come. In previous 2 classes on the subject we were required to do presentation which is evaluated by all students aside from the teacher himself. and today, the result was announced. Who would've thought my group was the most highly evaluated. No, it's not exactly a good thing, we were required to present it again! but yeah, the person who was responsible for presentation was absent today, so it was up to me and another one member who were in charge of the slides. The sudden notice was quite a shock. That was my first time doing a presentation in front of others here, impromptu. Ditto.

Thankfully, when my stock of chocolates is running down at the moment, we were given chocolate as reward!

We made gyoza! +verbal descriptions

2011-11-14T23:43:00.002+09:00

it's somewhat a chinese food but it seems like it's normally made in japanese home. so when my friend came over again last time, this is what we made.

apparently they usually use pork for the 'inti'/fillings but we replaced it with minced chicken. and actually we made 3 types of them. chicken kimchi, chicken miso and chicken umeboshi+cheese.

it was really yummy!

okay, don't ask me for the recipe. i only had to stuff the fillings into the skins and i managed to make that hideous curls (the 3rd picture is my first piece). eventually i was getting good at it though. and actually the gyoza is not fried like in the 5th pix, i had to borrow aluminum foil from others because i don't have the lid for my pan. they are somewhat steamed to produce the delicious gyoza.

oh gyoza! 餃子 <-- i just knew this is the kanji for it.

now i'm looking forward to what we will be cooking next time (or more accurately what Tsubasa-chan will cook). previously she made hamburgers too~~ (look below). but at least i already am resolute to learn how to make miso soup(let's see how serious i'll actually be). i love the miso soup that she makes each time, especially with the dearie mushrooms :D

wish i have this now

2011-11-10T01:42:00.000+09:00

i don't think i'll ever find a 5kg nutella like this anywhere else (this was discovered in a store in strip district, pittsburgh)

practising english

2011-11-09T01:23:00.001+09:00

recently i've frequented ERC lounge a lot. it's a place where people can freely come during the designated hours everyday and communicate in english, no nihongo(japanese language) allowed. i've made quite a few friends there with whom i enjoyed chatting. actually i'm not really that good in making a conversation, usually i just lost of idea what to talk of. honestly i think myself as a boring person to talk with, even while chatting to myself, i can be bored. oh, i'm starting to make a self-condemning post if i were to go on. better quit that, back to the topic, yeah i went there today as well.

i met a few people i've known from before and today i came along with one of my classmate, shouhei who's trying his best in english. he made quite a progress from few visits he has done so far. he no longer relies on the electronic dictionary as advised by ms. adriana who told him to utilise his brains more. he's still at an early stage in making a normal conversation so i tried my best to help him, but indeed i'm not a teacher material so it sometimes just get on my nerves when he's soo slow. luckily, there're a few students there who are actually going to be english teachers and they know how to handle such situation. phew~

so, the topic of the ielts came up when i saw Ken holding a book on it today. Ken is a good-looking guy who i'm not very shy to say "you got a really smooth skin, i envy you!" to him. i'm taking ielts this year (and for some reason next year too) as well given the chance to take it for free. since english is not really in use in my daily life as of lately, it kinda scared me off and i was reminded, one of the ways i use english is by blogging, which i've been quite away for a while. thanks Ken for triggering me to do this post. actually it's not like i'm not feeling to write an entry at all, in fact i have drafts here but it all remain as drafts but i couldn't finish it till the end. okay, the US trip entry only has one line so far. sometimes i've updated my livejournal first, that was quite inevitable as to how my fandom gets quite fierce lately.

and it made me down when Siri in iPhone4s just won't understand me. i'm glad i'm not using that or all i'll be throwing it away in tantrum.

the owner of the said iPhone is also my friend who just came to japan nearly a month ago from Thai whose name is Mai. with that kind of name and her look with fair skin, she's always been mistaken as a pure japanese. she just learned nihongo upon arriving here and she reminds me of myself a few years ago but in a way she's lucky to be in a whole japanese environment unlike me then. the other day we attended a some kind of party, and it was so amusing to watch Mai conversing with some nihonjin(japanese people), Mai was speaking in nihongo while the nihonjin is talking in english in return. to remind, both of them is a beginner in respective languages they were using. it was funny, i only look from the side and i can't help but to giggle all the way, it's too cute (girls really love to use this word somehow).

well, aside from that, there were a lot of events recently i'm just too lazy to update like one of the highlights of the year, the gakusai-school festival. it really worth an entry for it. or my trip to disneyland with my girlfriends-i'm so glad i managed to get close with them, it is so much fun. or more descriptions on the kouyou (watching autumn leaves) which i only put photos in my previous post. it was so stunning beyond words-is this a way to justify my action of only putting few visual proofs of it?. oh yeah, the US trip. in short, below is what my current state is (or hopefully is)

okay, i better blog more or i know my english language skill is rusting away in time. and also studying properly as i got a feeling i'm slacking off too much this semester.

p/s: as a way of thinking positively, recently the person i thought was being cold to me actually didn't know how to talk to me, and today i was glad to discover that was kinda true, i want to believe it's true at least. but, it made me reflect that so far maybe i've done the same thing to others, i often have no clue how to approach people, so in return perhaps they would see me as a cold person too. okay, maybe i'm just full of myself now

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

It's fall!!

2011-10-30T06:49:00.005+09:00

A lovely autumn and it's getting to chill to the bones~

yosh!

days without solitude

2011-10-22T15:45:00.001+09:00

are definitely the days i'll have more smiles on my face.

recently my friends have been coming to spend time together more. even in this cramped room, we can still have fun, make food, and sometimes sleep together. well, those are the times i love being in this room. my room which is so clattered, messy, untidy but cozy. we can talk about a whole lot of stuff, though at time when they talk too fast in japanese i can't even catch, but it's still fun.

one of the funny thing is when my friend spent the night, i woke up in the morning, and saw her in the futon and nonchalantly i asked,

"sedap tidur malam tadi? best kan futon tu?"

and i was wondering why she got such a perplexed face upon being asked that ^^"

and now we already have this sorta club of mechanical engineering girls, apparently only my batch has many girls (we have 5!) while other batches only have 1 at best among nearly 100 of boys. when i met the girl who is a junior a year under me, she cannot relax much but it turns out we are actually of the same age! next time, i hope he can wear off all that awkwardness.

so, when i'm spending my time alone in this room, something does feel not right for some reason. as much as i dread the coming monday which means school, i really look forward to it where we can have fun together again.

these things adorning my wall is my only companion on days like now

now, let's get all these works done!

diary - calendar - phone

2011-10-16T07:46:00.002+09:00

sorry for not updating what i really should (reminder: about the vacation). but this morning after a sleepless night and being comforted by watching the silliness of golden bomber group, i discovered something was off with my iphone.

some of the events i entered into the calendar are shifted from their original time. they are later than they should be! i didn't know why and i was puzzled. when i scrutinized it, they are late by about 12 hours. so i figured maybe things went wrong when i entered the events when i was in the States. but then even the recent ones are the same. oh why oh why. remind you, i was actually already lying on my bed preparing to sleep but this problem is bothering me too much. okay after searching there and here, i figured out the timezone setting was off when entered all the events before, and now with the latest iOS 5 (yeah, i already updated to new iOS) the timezone setting is turned on. apparently all my entries were set to the default some US timezone.

the only way to fix it is to readjust each of the event's timezone to tokyo to make them appear correctly.

as troublesome the previous may seem, actually something more serious actually happen. i didn't realize it earlier but all the events prior to sept14 were wiped up clean! ehhhh! i was so perplexed. how? why? if it's because i didn't backup the calendar anywhere during the iOS upgrade, then why did everything after sept14 (though the timezone was a wreck) remains?? anyone, enlighten me. i was already sooo sad as pretty much everything is recorded there, i somehow used the calendar as my diary to note whatever events i had since i came here. even simple occurrence like my friend coming over to my room to something exciting as live events. okay, i tried to keep calm. maybe it was my fault for not backing everything up. perhaps it can no longer be helped once this had happened. well, at least, i'll still reenter those big events that i don't want to forget. it was already enough for me to already forget most of what i've experienced in 20 years in my life. honestly i cannot vividly remember my schooldays anymore. it's like they never happened at all. it kinda sucks when you cannot remember be it pleasant or not. it'll be so sad to forget my first few months in japan where i really want to be.

so i entered the first live i've gone here, then the next one. but then when i recheck, the one i just entered was not there. eh, did i forget to tap 'done' just now? i entered it again and the next one. then, the same happens. ehh, i can't possible make the same mistake again? when i looked hard with my head already so confused, just seconds i entered the event, it disappears!! what?? ok, i give up. something is just wrong. no way it would just disappear like that, from texts to complete blank.

now i'm thinking of going to the apple store to inquire about this mysterious occuring. but it's in ginza. and i haven't started on my lab report yet. and i haven't gotten any wink of sleep since yesterday afternoon (where someone woke me up by calling at the door, inviting for some event somewhere at a church at omiya).

but this is really bothering me.

btw, in between of the above events, i actually discovered how to integrate (is this the right word, my confidence in my language skills is falling low nowadays) holidays in iphone calendar-in my case, the japan holiday. this way, you will be informed of the holidays and know what holiday it is for like last monday is 体育の日-Health and Sports Day, without the need of any extra calendar apps. the steps is quite simple from what i found in an article in the internet but the link given there is no longer usable. so here, i'll just rewrite the steps with correct link for anyone's reference.

1. from your iphone, go to this link: http://www.apple.com/downloads/macosx/calendars/japaneseholidaycalendar.html

2. at 'download' button available there, tap and hold. choose "開く" (or maybe "open" in english)

3. a dialogue box saying "カレンダー”日本の祝祭日”を照会しますか？" will appear (or something equivalent in english), just choose "照会" (again, i don't know the english equivalent)

4. after a while, another dialogue box "カレンダー”日本の祝祭日”が追加されました" appears, just tap "完了" (or "done"), and when you check your calendar, all public holidays is marked with their names you plausibly never knew. like next month on nov 3rd, it's 'national culture day'. ah, how i wish i can do the same for my university's holiday and events, then i won't need to check the paper campus diary every time.

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

sentimental

2011-10-01T10:22:00.000+09:00

sorry for not updating for sooo long.

and i've thought of updating about my US trip, at least after i'm back to japan.

but no, i have to keep myself busy by saying "what should i do??"

and this weekend i got a kinda homestay programme.

which actually requires me to prepare now as i got to get off in a few hours to go there.

oh iman, you're such a lazy bum.

and school starts this monday.

yet, i'm enveloped by this indescribable feeling which is just trivial and unnecessary.

but yesterday's night i just felt to listen to this one song.

yeah, been listening to this one song on repeat until i fell asleep (really late).

and once i woke up, did what every human do when they wake up, and this song plays on loop again. should i say it's haunting? it's rare for me to be able to listen to a song repetitively as i'm a type of person who gets bored easily. but i don't know, something just seeps in so deep.

ok, that's a short note for this morning. i better get going, pack whatever i need. hopefully everything goes right. no more of this unwanted gloominess.

minna, ganbarou!! sayonara to that old selves

maybe i'll update the stuff i've been wanting to soon, when i get busy perhaps

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

the tohoku +a bit of hokkaido train trip (a tecchan travellogue)

2011-08-27T07:02:00.002+09:00

i've long thought of travelling across nihon using trains, they even got this ticket called seishun 18 kippu that enables you to do so with less money, a good choice for those who has so much time to kill as it only allows you to use the local trains, no express or shinkansen. (more details here)

the problem was i have no one to travel with. well, it'll be very boring to spend time so much time on trains alone.

and suddenly, on a sunday night, i brought this plan upon my friend who surprisingly eager to do the same thing too! so right after the iftar, we bought the ticket, and then the next day, we took off! yeah, i love you, Arini Nuran to make my wish come true!

okay, the plan was to go as far as we could with the available timespan. as it was only permitted to travel using local trains, we'll need to change trains a whole lot, so when we ask the person at the counter, we learnt that from omiya, the farthest we could reach in a day is aomori. and the route is something like this.

Day 1 (15th Aug '11)
to catch that first train from omiya, i had to depart from the nearest station to my house at about quarter to 6 in the morning. the bus hasn't even started running at the time, so i had to cycle from my house as early as quarter after 5. now i'm ready for adventure! we travelled through tohoku main line from omiya up to the end of it at morioka. that's 546.1 km with 6 transits in between and a total of 114 stations along the line. during the transit at sendai, there was more than an hour free time before the next train, so we explored a bit around the station. it really feels a lot like omiya station! honestly. at morioka, to our surprise, when we board the IGR line as recommended next in the guide given by the person we asked, it's not included in the ticket so we had to pay extra -.- that's 82km more, dotted with 18 stations until Metoki station. then it became aomori railway line which thankfully is included in seishun18 ticket. that tops 123.3km more to our journey as we passed another 27 stations before we finally arrived at aomori. the whole journey for the day took more than 14 hours but it was worthwhile as we can see beautiful sceneries along the way~~

when we arrived at aomori, it was already nighttime and we don't plan to stay there. instead, we bought another ticket to board express hamanasu (this really reminds me of galileo galilei's song-hamanasu no hana), it's a overnight train that carries us up to sapporo in hokkaido in seven hours to travel on a nearly 500km track from aomori. though we know it goes through an underwater tunnel (which i discovered later named as seikan tunnel), of course it just feels like any other tunnels :P so, in about 24 hours, our journey transported us from omiya where we began, to sapporo in the north of nihon. from saitama prefecture where we started, we travelled across 6 prefectures-ibaraki, tochigi, fukushima, miyagi, iwate and aomori before reaching hokkaido! that feels good in a way^^ a sad thing that i was sound asleep to see the scenery during the morning, Arini told me how beautiful it was though, the view of sapporo after dawn. now, that's more the reason i should go again. (click for photos of day1^^)

Make a slideshow

so, on to day 2 (16th Aug '11). when we arrived at sapporo, it was a bit after 6 in the morning. nothing was open, and we were pretty worn. desperate to find somewhere to clean ourselves up and to actually lie down and rest, we eventually found an internet cafe that allows us to do so, which is located just in front of the station! we took a breather there, and we construct a plan of what to do the whole day we have in sapporo. unfortunately that day, it was raining :( prior to the trip, i checked around and planned to go to kaitaku no mura-some kind of outdoor museum featuring the village in old times. the rain ruined it all. so the plan was reduced to only 2 places, shiroi koibito-a chocolate factory and another one is wintersports museum. at the factory, i can't help but be reminded of willie wonka! all the chocolates makes my mouth watery already. i was being a bit stingy to only buy a little, the chocolates are really yummy! afterwards, to reach the wintersports museum, we had to walk a bit, the rain did not even help. back at home it's so freaking sweltering hot, but here added with the rain, the temperature dropped as down as 18degree celcius. here, as the name applies, it showcases about wintersports, but during summer, they also used the okurayama ski jump place for summer jump. it does look scary to jump that high, but in the midst of rain, we witnessed some people attempting the jump! i was never short of amazement to see those. in the museum itself, there's interactive attraction that enables you to get to know the sports and the people involved. well, until now i'm still not sure what's the distance that they measure to pick the winners, i know i'm a bad learner.

and when dusk falls upon us, it's time for iftar. how useful the internet is, i can easily find a halal restaurant, in fact a 100% halal unlike the ones i usually find (i still feel somewhat wrong for a muslim store to serve liquors). it's a indonesian restaurant named 'warung jawa' located few stops away from sapporo station. the shop owner is very friendly. i'll surely come again for my next hokkaido trip (i wonder when i'll be able to do this again, next time until wakkanai). we spent time at her store until a bit before our departure. we already learnt our lesson, we should arrive at the platform early to get the seats. even before the the train comes, people are already in queue. we took the same train we boarded last night-hamanasu back to aomori. (click play for day2^^)

flash slideshow

we got our seat, though it makes no point to get window-seat but i still prefer this one. but then, yeah, it was crowded that night too and someone took the seat beside me. arini got another seat all for herself. next to me was an old man. honestly i was wishing to talk to someone on this journey, but then i'm really not good when talking to old folks. i just can hardly comprehend what they say, it's like a bit of another language for me to understand. and this guy was passionately making a conversation with me talking about this and that which i only catch a bit of it. poor him when i only gave half-hearted response to his story. and as tired i got for the day, i fall asleep pretty fast.

Day 3 (17th Aug '11). it's a day wholly on trains again. this time we decide to ride until nagaoka. we left early so that we can have long transit time at akita. this time we travelled along the west coast, the view is clearly different from the previous one we had. firstly, before leaving aomori, we crossed through vast area of apple orchards. okay, my first time seeing such sights. then we entered akita. i was very excited! there were a lot of houses with old-style roofs. i don't know why but i just like seeing those. it's beautiful. i also saw a one-coach-train in one of the stops, i was ecstatic enough though i didn't actually manage to board one. there's also quite a long stop at Sakata station in yamagata where i discovered that 'okuribito' is filmed in that area. from aomori to nagaoka, there were only 5 transits, travelling on half of Ouu Line until Akita for about 185.8km, then changing to Uetsu Main Line that starts from akita and we crossed throughout the whole line of 271.7 km until Niitsu in Niigata prefecture. there we hopped to another line, Shin'etsu Main Line that carried us to nagaoka. once we arrived, mimi and mr. hayakawa kindly greeted us and even brought us for dinner. well, i know saizeriya is practically everywhere in japan :P. total number of stations we passed for the day : 38+60+14=112 ^o^

Day 4 (18th Aug '11). here's where arini and I parted ways. i had been to nagaoka just recently before that but it was the first time for arini so she stayed for another day there. whereas i continued on the journey from the morning alone. actually i got an event to attend in the evening in tokyo, so i took the train from nagaoka station headed to my final destination, yurakucho station in tokyo. what makes me happier this time is i'm crossing another prefectures. from niigata prefecture, i passed through gunma (there are a lot of advertisements on gunma at the moment), then back in saitama before reaching tokyo. the sceneries was beautiful too but unfortunately the window had no great clarity, i can't even view the whole awesomeness, let alone taking photos of them. for the lines that took, from nagaoka, it was Jouetsu Line that spans from nagaoka till takasaki, afterwards i hopped on Takasaki Line. i could have just rode it until the end of the line at Ueno, but then i remembered of my phone which was lacking in juice. Ueno station is big and it'll be tough to find my way to the nearest softbank centre. so i hopped off at akabane which is smaller in scale and softbank center is very near to the station. i regretted a bit, apparently here they only charge the phone for a definite time unit that is 30 minutes and my phone only managed to regain its juice up until 50% only. finished with that, i rode another line very familiar to me, Keihin-Tohoku Line until i reached my destination, Yurakucho that is only 13 stops away and had the fun i sought for the night. well, that's beyond the range of this post's theme so i'll skip about it. the journey for the final day took only 5 and a half hours and passing through about 70 stations^^ (click play for day 3&4^^)

Make a picture slideshow

when the day ended, so did my whole journey. it was quite a long one. but travelling this way is somehow fun. indeed, the whole things with transits might be a hassle for some people and any other faster means are preferable, but along this journey i could witness a variety of sceneries. well, i admit when the tiredness got the better of me, i'm dead in sleep :P but yeah, it was only for 4 days but it was worth it. and i got to discover that actually for trip to tohoku and hokkaido like this, rather than seishun18 kippu, there's another value ticket that's more convenient. i learnt my lesson so next time i alredy know.

as numerical values are so much fancied by human beings, to record it, for the whole journey, the total length of the tracks we travelled on was about 2500km, or maybe more because i didn't count the one i used to return to saitama after reaching tokyo. and the total number of stations we passed through was roughly about 340. the plan was done in a whim but it was satisfying. definitely gonna have such adventures again, maybe to the other side of nihon. nihon has 47 prefectures in total, and i've only ever been in less than a quarter of all that. i still got lots of others to explore.

what a gloomy post in the first week of ramadan

2011-08-06T05:57:00.000+09:00

for some unknown reasons, it seems like i've been away from this blog a quite a while.

nande darou?

is it because i feel like there's nothing worthy to write? well, quite a lot happens, good and bad.

what have i done all this while?

exam's over - good news
meeting friends - good news
travelling for quite a bit - good news
watching magnificent fireworks - good news
flumpool's new single - good news

iftar alone - bad news
not getting part-time work - bad news
not so much money to spend as i like - bad news
my language skill in all languages getting worse - bad news

+some other stuff - bad news

okay, maybe they balance each other. i shouldn't feel so miserable i guess. it's indescribable. but i only know this feeling lies somewhere in the negative zone. shuuh, shuuh, please go away.

btw, i'm stuck with a lot of dramas this season. they're my companions during most evenings.

uurgh, honestly i hate it when actually there's a lot that i want to vent out but manage not to do so. i don't even know whether it's because i unconsciously refuse to or simply am not able to. it's like so many things are running in the mind and everything's in a mess and entangled, and i don't even know where to start to make things in order. let's say a whole lot of shoelaces getting mixed, all in dark colours, when you feel like untangling it, not even a single aglet(the end part of shoelace) can be seen. you're tired but you know you gotta do it. it just makes you frustrated.

in the end, it feels like something is sticking to your chest and won't budge. what a weight.

wishing everyone a happy day, a happy life, a blessed ramadan!

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

the end of exam note

2011-07-18T14:02:00.001+09:00

it's nearly a month since my last post. that's the longest hiatus i have so far!

so, our exams have ended. well, for other places, they might still be in the middle of it, or it's possibly drawing very near already. the reason my uni finishes the semester early this year is all for the sake of saving electricity. longer semester means longer use of the classes, the airconds and everything following it. so, the whole semester is shortened. usually, our exam is in august. so lucky me this year, we got longer summer holiday!

don't ever ask how the exam went. i don't want to remember about it.

but then, i have barely any plan for the first half of my holiday. i do try to get some part time job, at least, i could find extra money to cover the cost for the later half of my holiday :D but i don't know whether it'll go well or not. okay, gotta ask the seniors about this. i know near to nothing as to how to get jobs here.

i've been here for 3 months already. did a lot of things, schools and stuff. but then i realized, i didn't take as much pictures. like yesterday, i went out with some friends to watch harry potter movie, and we even went all the way to ueno from saitama just for lunch, yet there's no single photo of it. the same goes for quite a number of events before that. i don't know why. and i didn't even get to take photos with my experiment group though i badly wanted to do so, just that i didn't have much courage to ask for it.

it'll be a waste if i just forget all these precious memories (i doubt lab experiments could count as one though, honestly i have very little of what i like about it) yosh, for the rest of the holiday, i'll make sure there's at least a photo for each event that happens.

these are from my last experiment for the semester, i admit i like this one a bit. it's interesting (the arm moves according to the hand's movement9

or to see how childish these boys look in front of this amazing technology (lia~~~ :"> )

well, the above was typed yesterday. talk about me who tends to leave my work halfway done.

like my report about the experiment above which is due tomorrow. i'm hating this self who always ends up doing last minute works. urgh. i don't know any way to get myself more motivated to do works early. the 1st semester was a mess so i sincerely hope the next one will be better. yeah, hope is a very nice word.

this almost sounds like a random rants already.

so everyone, have a nice day! btw, today is 'umi no hi'/'day of the sea??' in japan, it's a public holiday. it's a hot day in summer, take care of yourselves!!

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

i didn't see this coming!

2011-06-25T16:43:00.002+09:00

when i purchased my iPhone, it was only the week before the iPhone white was launched. and i originally didn't even have that strong desire to possess an iPhone in the first place, especially the design that does not particularly attract me at all. but i did after all, it's a smart phone, and the line provider is softbank (this is the major reason coz practically everyone close to me is using that, so to use another will be my loss)

and today, i just saw this:

it's a flip and it's smart phone!!

btw, smap in this is sooo funny.

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

Baskin robbins a.k.a sa-tiwan

2011-06-24T02:34:00.001+09:00

From the first time i went to indulge the srumptiliciousness of baskin robbin's ice-cream here, it took me less than a month to savor it for the third time already. But there's something quite different between the one in malaysia and in japan. It's how it is known.

The first time i went was on 31st of last month. It was chilly at the time, but who cares, there's discount! I invited my friend to go along with me (i don't wanna eat alone at the shop). So i gave a mail:

Me : there's discount at baskin robbins today right? I want to eat icecream, let's go together!

My friend : alright! Where's the place?

Me: i think it's very near to Saizeriya

My friend : u mean Sa-tiwan?

*it took me about a few minutes to figure out what he said, i was like "what korean word he's talking about now?"*

me : yea!

Apparently no one knows the name baskin robbins here. Even the website is www.31ice.co.jp they call it thirty-one (of coz with the katakana english). I wonder why they don't translate it fully like 'sanjuuichi'? Lol but yeah, it's really a delight especially in a hot weather like now. I'm still trying to get used with the recent heat. It's just like malaysia now. Wearing 2 layers nearly not applicable. Back to the topic, actually i also tried another place for ice-cream just the other day. They have many specialty menu with the icecream and they prepare it on the spot, like handling dough on the ice-cold stone slabs. btw, the shop's name is 'cold stone' (and aisya jLo mistook it as 'cold storage' at first :P) what makes it quite special is how merry the atmosphere they personally create! They practically sing a lot songs (mostly that sounds like nursery rhymes) every now and then while serving the customers. But maybe because they are simply attracted to our foreigner self, when it was our turn, they interviewed us instead. Maa ii ka, at least the icecream was truly delicious!!

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

2 consecutive weekends at home

2011-06-20T02:43:00.002+09:00

(okay, i lied as it's not entirely true, for lunch on the recent saturday, i went somewhere which i spent about 5 hours, but yeah, it's only for lunch, with dessert of a very delicious ice-cream).

yet, what i did was just idling time away leaving the works all done at the very last minute. give me no matter how many hours in a day, and i can still fill it with nothing beneficial at all.

what's wrong with my head? can't i feel the sense of crisis by now?

about 2/3 weeks left before the final exam.

p/s: i want a new purse(mine is lost for quite a while). a leather purse specifically. a beautiful one but won't cost me much. is that too much to ask?

something like these perhaps? (just why these are sooo damn expensive??)

Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

Thus the 8th weekend

2011-06-12T12:18:00.005+09:00

This view is magnificent. For some reason i managed to drag my feet to odaiba last friday, but still no chance to ride this. Anyone would like to ride this together? Odaiba is beautiful and i believe it's even more so if viewed from above, like from inside the gondola.

Everyone, do your best completing all the works! It's school again tomorrow. I'm trying hard doing mine in the remaining of the day while listening to Oceanlane. I love their music, if only there's any of their concerts i can go to....

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

Borborygmus

2011-06-10T04:54:00.003+09:00

i just found an interesting word.

it's a word that describes what always happens to me recently. it simply means the growling of the stomach.

i just woke up and it makes that sound again.

by the time i'm writing this, it's about a quarter to 5 in the morning and it's already so bright.

this is the sight i get from my balcony at 4:50 a.m. passing that gate at the other side is my university. walking about 100 meters from there is pretty much the engineering department. i love my current house.

and actually yesterday i slept from nearly 8 p.m. until it was nearly 4 in the morning. i missed yesterday episode of BOSS!

okay, i should be grateful i woke up in time for Subuh prayer, but regrettable for the Isya' that i missed (never thought i could actually miss that one, astaghfirullah)

what happened to my body clock? it seems not to be in japan. this is not the first time. it's becoming frequent lately. even on the previous day too (but there was no drama i watch on the tv on that day, so i don't particularly care)

i just hope today it won't behave that way again, i have something to look forward tonite. yeah, nico!

jaa, mata!

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

when my tongue got frozen

2011-06-07T23:24:00.004+09:00

one of the thing that i feel a bit anxious here is when someone ask me something about my religion, like the 'why' questions. obviously, muslims are a minority here, and most japanese barely have any interaction with muslims, so they are full of curiosity upon meeting one. because i'm the one writing here, yes i'm talking about the very conspicuous me. and given my very restricted japanese ability, explaining is always so difficult, and i'm most afraid i'll cause misunderstanding due to my own shortcomings, or being offensive instead.

one of the friends i made here has some muslim friends before (and malaysian in fact, very similar as me). so he was quite informed about muslim, he knows that we do pray and have stuff we eat and do not eat. i was a bit comfortable with that, at least he's not puzzled when i say i want to go pray when we are in the middle of something. but just the other day, he asked me this:

"why do you not eat pig? is it because it's holy?"

at the time, i was eating ice-cream, and when he says that, the image of pig came across my head, and this is my first time hearing such idea that pig is a sacred animal. let's just say the ice-cream somehow tasted awry all of a sudden. okay, actually it makes sense if he considers about hinduism, and applies the same rule as well. and here is where i could not properly explain it. i wanted to say, because it's not halal, but of course he'll understand nothing of this. instantaneously i answered with my limited japanese "NO, it's not a holy animal at all! rather, we look down at the animal, it's dirty" okay, i don't know whether that's the correct way of putting it. honestly, i wanted to say how very dirty we view the animal, but when i blurted those kind of words out, it just seems insensible to the other party.

it struck me deep and i really felt how my nihongo fails me. it really made me feel down. not being able to say the correct stuff and to get the point across.

so, after a few researches on the net, it was interesting to find how some japanese found their explanation to the above matter. for instance:

1.pigs spread disease in the past, so it was prohibited to eat
2.in the dessert, pigs eat everything, including the dung which are valuable for fuel. so it was prohibited to have pigs. (this probably refers to origin of islam, where prophet Muhammad s.w.t comes from)

but of course. those are nowhere near the true reason at all. but those are what the people here would come to if they thought of searching the answer to that question online.

i wish they have manuals from long ago to enable us to answer question so we are more prepared. so with some efforts following that, currently the best answer i could get for the above question is from here. or, the closest they can understand is relating it with dog-they don't eat that too, and in our view dog and pig belongs to the same group after all.

another famous question from them, "do you wear that scarf even while sleeping?" ^^"

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

the 7th weekend : yokohama (part one)

2011-06-07T04:10:00.007+09:00

in the previous weekend, i spent time cooped up in my room, so i regained my momentum back, and there i go, more places added to my weekend diary.

to start it off, the journey there was epic. i mean, i would never ever forget that super clumsy me. the plan was to meet up with Ceca at shibuya station and together we would go to Lia's house. as we didn't particularly have any other plan to do on that Saturday, i thought i could complete my report first prior to going out in the afternoon. in fact the rendezvous was supposed to be at around 4:30, so stepping out of my house even after asar (half past 3) is still okay.

but no, i did not manage to complete the report, so i had no choice but to bring it along with me to yokohama. i dared not to finish the weekend with reports still undone, the dateline being monday. and i'm going to house of the geniuses after all, they can help me. so, i was busy packing my bag, the clothes, the netbook, the notes, the relevant books. thankfully my backpack fit all that. so, quite later than planned, it was nearly 4 p.m that i started off the journey. the closest train station(Minamiyono) only takes 10-15 minutes by bicycle from what i heard, so i guess i could just save 170yen if i were to go there by bus. paddling the bicycle, i tried reaching there with the help of the map in the phone. okay, it was no 10-15 minutes, i got lost. and the route was partially hills, so it took more time than i thought. even to find where to park my bicycle took time too. i was ready to apologize to ceca coz i was about to be late. to reach shibuya, i also had to change trains. and then, here where the unexpected came-it was only a station away from shibuya. i realized i forgot a very very important thing at home!!

i alighted at Shinjuku (can you believe it, it was already this far!) and took another train back to Minamiyono again. in 3 hours, i travelled so far just to reach the same point again. i'm relieved they don't charge you if you get in and out from the same station. quickly got on the bicycle again, and rushed to my house in haste. okay, this time it was truly in that 10-15 minutes range. entered the house again, took the stuff i forgot, drank water straight from the 2-litre bottle, and dashed out again. (let's count how many times i typed again) but i think my head actually got dizzy, i haven't eaten the whole day. so it was nearly impossible to reach the station by bicycle again. in the end, i parked the bicycle in the campus and took the bus. yeah, the 170yen that i wanted to save got spent after all-with an extra 3 hours of time wasted.

what a long journey just to arrive here

so that was the journey.

from shibuya to my final destination-Hiyoshi took another half an hour. so, when i arrived at Hiyoshi station, ceca was already with Lia and Iza. Hiyoshi is the station next to Keio University. i know those 2 girls hate this when i say this, but i when i reached the station, i really do feel the atmosphere where it's like smart-looking people are all around. there were a lot of students, perhaps on the way back from their club activities. i don't know how to describe this, of course, here the infrastructure is clearly different, even the people exude different aura. it's like a different world LOL. so, it was night when i arrived, though i can't view much of the surrounding, it was beautiful.

my breakfast+lunch+dinner at otoya. ikan bakar. how nice if they also have sambal belacan or sambal kicap.

and of course, desert included

the next day.... (continued to next post :P)

p/s: and i just remembered i still have the bicycle in the campus as of now

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

and we were taught the wrong one all along

2011-06-02T18:23:00.003+09:00

know how the school textbook sometimes don't exactly teach the right thing? and it stays like that until no one knows when.

so today was Seminar (i don't know how to explain this, but let's just say it's a subject where we're exposed to the research labs, something like that). for the past half semester, it was only like a class session with the sensei from respective research labs giving lectures explaining stuff regarding the topics related to their labs. as any lecture may be, those were as effective as sleeping pills. sorry sensei m(_ _)m

so, from this week onward, we're split up into 4 different major labs. there were Fluid Dynamic, Machining, Control Engineering and Thermodynamic. fortunately i got the one of my choice-fluid dynamic. coz it just seems interesting. as my sensei says, choose something you like, and this one involves aeroplane.

and here, like i mentioned, we learn about planes. yeay, i love this! so, we went at the meeting place and the sensei later arrived. seems like we were to watch a DVD for about half an hour.

it's a video about migrating birds. rather than 'about' the birds, it only 'shows' the bird. half an hour watching birds flying and flying through the globe, with barely any narration. how i think the video is actually a video for relaxation or somewhat. well, it does have a soothing effect like a healing video for stressed people.

okay, the point here was only to spot the difference between flying mechanism of living things (bird) compared to human inventions (okay, now i wonder why 30 minutes are needed for that sole reason). so, we were asked to explain how exactly things fly. the stuff about lift and all. this reminds me a lot to Ishimatsu-sensei. i was like, "why the heck don't i remember much of the contents of what he taught me before?".

so, the 7 of us tried to remember what we've learned so far, and the explanation that there are pressure difference due to the different velocity of air above and below the aerofoil. i sensed something when the sensei was not really satisfied but i had no clue at the time. he even asked us why exactly the air that split at the front of the aerofoil must meet at the tail. of course, we were puzzled too. well, the above explanation was generally what we were taught during school and i've remembered it like that ever since.

if only i remembered Ishimatsu-sensei's class...

so yeah, that kind of explanation(the so-called "principle of equal transit times") is already obsolete. and i only discovered that after i returned home and surfed the net. when i read it here, it all makes sense. and i'm pretty sure i've heard/read this same explanation before, but it just didn't stick in my mind. like how 'Newton Law' or 'Air Viscosity' play a role in lift. we are people, and we forget stuff.

and i got to do this as a report, and present the findings next week. i wish my nihongo won't fail me.

so, how i wish they teach the right things from the beginning. sometimes, the memory of the first contact with something is the one that lasts long. like how i still remember there are 4 different area of taste on our tongue, and they still haven't introduced umami in textbook yet, have they? and i still cannot remember the correct chemical reactivity series, there was a bit of confusion when the one i remembered from high school is different for when i entered university, is there really any difference?

btw, i'm happy today i got to remember the names of the members of our group, hopefully i'll still remember when i'm gonna meet them next week^^ *nagasu*tomoi*minami*matsunaga*matsuda* just typing down to not let me forget, at least i'll try not to mix up all these

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

note before the end of may

2011-05-29T19:54:00.006+09:00

the end of may means half of my semester are already done with

while i'm still clueless about most of the classes.

the end of may also means, june's approaching.

my read-book-list still haven't increased since the early april.

what has become of my a-book-a-month target?

nevertheless, i read a few volumes of manga (like i expected, Waltz is truly a great purchase):D

now i hope i could finish the novels stuck at the rack beside my bed.

i wonder just when i can finally be a great time manager to be able to spare time for those.

as i am currently a queen of wasting time.

dame da!

p/s: and yet again, i'm eating instant noodle for dinner. no wonder my head seems not to be functioning at its best.

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

what i learned

2011-05-28T15:48:00.003+09:00

after more than a month staying here, i had to shop a lot.

and being a typical student, cheap stuff are what i sought for.

but now i know, the cheapest one always doesn't fit your need.

like how i ended up with 2 pairs of sneakers as the first one (the cheap one) hurts my feet.

and i just made another purchase of this kind again,

aaa, this really wears me out.

ok, now i better save up coz things are expensive, or more like only expensive things are truly functional.

ditto

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

day 40 -sushi-

2011-05-27T00:55:00.004+09:00

it really took me a long time to update things here.

and already 40 days has passed since i first set my foot on this land.

but then, only yesterday i got to eat sushi for first time in nihon.

it was really fun. of course, time spent with friends are always enjoyable. and funny and everything else.

better than doing things alone, right?

yeah, i've infected with kawabe's style of blogging with line by line basis. (note: kawabe is the drummer for one of my fav bands, WEAVER and he blogs almost everyday here)

well, coz it seems easier and neater to look. compared to this one sensei's writing on the board. he really writes things anywhere he feels like it, nowhere everything on it is in any particular order.

i think i've been spoiled too much by a lot of sensei who write everything so neat, easy to copy straight to my notes. now i'm troubled. i even got a test for that particular subject this monday.

i think i've started to 'mengumpat' or more familiar in english, ~~grapevines~~ gossipping. lol

so, why don't i just continue?*evil grins*

back to today's event, like i said, it's fun and indeed FUNNY. how something i predicted actually came true. how people's behaviour can be that easily foreseen is amusing. i read a lot of shoujo manga so it's funny how to see stuff often illustrated in manga to be before my own eyes. like how someone has a crush on another, and obviously shown yet barely gets any response.

somehow, i feel sorry.

okay, now i feel bad. but the fact i find it amusing to watch is not a lie.

nevertheless, it was really enjoyable, eating sushi and all. thanks to all these people. but then, look at the difference of the number of plates on both tables. respectively there were 4 boys and 3 girls yet the number of plates is greater on the girls' side. gyaku janai??

また遊びに行きたいな～

p/s: i got a sorta test tomorrow, yet i can still update blog?

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

to be honest

2011-05-23T19:00:00.001+09:00

living alone is simply lonely.

lol. talking about the obvious.

but yeah, when i go to classes, i do meet my friends but then, when i returned home, there's no one but me alone.

only when it's the weekend, it feels lively, which requires a bit of effort to go somewhere with people i know, and spend time, no matter how trivial it is. or for some stupid reason, like i can't do my homework alone in my room, so i took the trains to go to the neighboring city.

i cleaned up the room after a while, yet i still can't find the lost wallet. and it still has 10 singapore dollar in it. well, thanks to my habit of spending every last yen i have in the wallet each time i shop. yeah, i went shopping again last week. an unplanned one as i only intended to only go to Ueno Zoo.

i managed to see giant panda for about 30 seconds.

the giant panda was behaving like a sloth.

just like how i'm feeling most of the time.

so, what i'm going to do this weekend?

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

GW '11

2011-05-08T23:25:00.002+09:00

ohisashiburi~~~

yappari, typing from the big keyboard here at the computer still gives a better feeling. and i can type faster.

so, as the title goes, this is so as to not forget the first golden week i had here. just for some who doesn't know, you might like clicking here to get a clue of what i'm talking about. this is a prized holiday since there will be no holidays excluding the weekends until we finish our exam, that is in July.

for this year, the golden week is a bit inconvenient. it's a friday off bundled with the weekend, and three days more off in the middle of the next week. so, the monday of school sandwiched in the middle of these two was really demotivating.

so, part one-Friday till Sunday (29th apr~1st may)
on friday, i went to shinjuku with Arini. only two of us wandering into the complete unknown roads of shinjuku by ourselves. the original plan was to spend the day shopping so that was what we did. but unlike me who brought back about 10 pieces of clothing, arini barely shopped for anything except for a few. ate kebab for brunch at a shop with such a friendly owner, and finally some food that i can call hot.

for saturday and sunday, it was a gathering for the sisters at a campsite in Seseragi somewhere in Saitama. yeah, we were really close with nature. the water is like icewater. and then i'm plunged back into the town life of saitama (though the prices of stuff are high here, but it's still not a city) for the Monday.

and goes to part 2!! Tuesday till Thursday (3rd~5th May)

and Tuesday came, holiday mood again! in fact, we went into a lott of places in that single one day. On that day, it's me and Arini again and also Aisyah Jlo~~ Takuya offered to show us the around, that's so kind of him. he also brought along his Korean girlfriend who is shy but friendly. so, first we made our way to Harajuku.

it was so packed with people we could hardly slip through the massive crowd. after being there for about an hour, we retreated and headed for lunch at shin-okubo, somewhere a station away. ate at a thai restaurant after united with another bunch making a table of 10 people at the cramped place. well, not bad but i guessed i've just picked the wrong menu, it's not that amiable to my tongue. and afterwards, a bit of detour for someone was looking for a specific store, it was cloudy but we still went for ikebukuro. thanks to the guide of the day, without much ado, we reached our destination-Nekobukuro! it's located at the most upper floor of some building, the rest of the building is Tokyu Hands store. we entered the premise and there they were, a bunch of cats lying everywhere. i mean, they just lie and do nothing. so inactive perhaps tired from being an exhibit all day every single day. well, i won't be surprised even if these cats are intentionally sedated or something, coz they are just plain lazy to move at all. like this sleeping cat, we were tired too so we called the day off and 3 of us returned to Jlo's house in Chiba~

Wednesday, the real reason of our sleepover at Jlo's house. we were invited to join a sort of manager at Jlo's residence to go fishing~ well, i never thought i'll see a japanese rice field by now. where i live at, it's all concrete. here at somewhere in chiba, it's quite a village. beside the field, the waterway houses some fishes, honestly we were surprised to find we're actually fishing here. we originally thought we're going to some river or somewhere. but more surprisingly, we weren't the only one fishing there, though not as much as people flocking in harajuku, but cars and vans are lined along road. the result: 2 tiny fishes both caught by the expert Arini.

Thursday, picnic at Shimizu Kouen. originally there was no plan of this but it just happens that some senpai are going there on that day, so we stayed at Chiba for another night and joined the crowd.

so, before we go separate ways, together we entered a flower garden. the fee is quite the same as entering nekobukuro. though we were off the season a bit, the flowers that are present are simply magnificent. i guess this one deserves a post of it's own to show it's whole spectacle.

and the next day came, it was school again before another weekend. so on to part 3?

hehehe, until the next post ;)

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

The apps

2011-04-29T09:56:00.003+09:00

It'll be a lie if I say this is a complete first time of me using such a high tech device, previously I've used PDA and such but this iPhone really can make me so engrossed. Back at home, even if I dream of using one, it can hardly be realized, what with the exorbitant price. But here, almost all of us(the newly arrived JAD students) are using it for the convenience it posesses.

Other than the basic function of making calls, sending mails n browsing the net, here's what makes my life much easier:

1. The route finder for trains. Like the other day when I promised to meet someone at Omiya and going by myself, this helps.

2. The app for prayer times n Qiblat direction

3. Facebook, twitter n skype n livejournal- the most used social apps

4. Bump, to exchange data with othe devices by just 'bumping'

5. Notes as an effort to remember my incomplete homeworks

6. Mirror- just interested by haven't had a dire need for it just yet

7. QR code reader to easily access webs n receiving contact data from others

8. Thermometer - haven't calibrated this yet

9. Earthquake apps, for viewing records of earthquakes around the globe (I doubt this is useful) and the other one warns of incoming earthquake within nihon - this one sure is useful

10. Blogger+, with which I'm using to post this. It comes with a price though

11. N the most important - Active money. Another paid app but worth it. It's used for personal bookkeeping so I can keep track of my expenditure. After abt 2 weeks i know i've spent about ¥250000 already.

Location:shinjuku, tokyo

The entry that supposed to be a week ago

2011-04-29T00:31:00.002+09:00

Day 8 in nihon and I went to akihabara the 2nd time unplanned.

Amount spent: ~¥8000

I love shopping.

Though the trip to Tokyo was unintentional, good thing I can finally use the phone. Senpai guided the way to apple store at Ginza, and my problematic phone got exchanged with a new one. As easy as that.

And now I'm loving the many apps.

Gotta focus on studies!

I'm still looking for an application that enables me to use blogger more conveniently. Seems like there is still none that are free. Even livejournal already has it's own application so it puzzles me why blogger does not. Definitely a hassle to open safari browser like this. Should I just pay for the existing app?

Tomorrow's holiday!!! But I got a report due this Monday(~_~;)

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

too tired to type

2011-04-19T20:58:00.001+09:00

the title shall explain by itself.

my new collection

Location:Saitama University, Saitama-shi, Saitama-ken

the last nite

2011-04-16T01:48:00.002+09:00

now it has come to this kind of time. finally, the awaited day is only a few hours away. in less than 24 hours, i'll be off the land.

so, how actually did i spend my last few days before flying off? going out at most days!

well, i read books. manga can still be considered books, right? so i read the whole series of '20th century boys'! actually i reread it, but in hard copy this time. when i read it before, it was all pixel-ed and i had to stare on the screen for so long, of course, it's comprised of 23 volumes after all, topped up with 2 extra volumes which concludes the whole story. it's really interesting!

the nice thing is i find myself reading manga in japanese so naturally now. that makes me so happy. i did set my goal of getting myself able to read manga and watch drama as soon as finishing my JAD program. prior to reading this one, i finished reading pluto too, both from the same mangaka-Naoki Urasawa! his works are simply fabulous and amazing. the story will hook you on and the suspense never fail to keep you jumpy. well, both of this is sorta heavy for some readers. it's a seinen manga after all. all this thanks to JFKL Library, i need not to pay a cent! except the transportation cost.

and more about books, i bought another one today, the temptation is far too high, i just gotta have it in my possession. rather than buying, i was using the voucher i got, all thanks to my bro who made a big purchase the other day which entitled him for a rm50 voucher after spending rm500 in kinokuniya-see how this store could scrap money out of you. this one is called 'You Shall Know Our Velocity' by dave eggers, mostly i was attracted by title, but then when i tried reading it a bit, i find myself hooked already. the one i just bought the other day is still unfinished though, the one i've been coveting for so long-'Stories'all new tales edited by neil gaiman and al sarrantonio. but from my recent tendency of getting immersed in reading while commuting, throughout the 7-hour flight tomorrow i could finish most of them i think.

now let's hope i could finish these two soon coz i'm alredy eyeing on japanese novel next

the last book i just finished was good too, in fact great. now that's another haruki marukami's in my list. but this particular book titled 'Underground' is kind of special because it revolves around a real incident. he probes into the tokyo gas attack that occurred at tokyo subway in 1995 and publishes the interviews he did with some of the people involved in it-the victims and the part of organization that's apparently behind the attack. it gives the view inside the incident firsthand from the people at the scene from their perspectives and the effect long after it, mentally and physically. once something had already sunk in the mountain on the past, one can still be affected by it no matter how much it weighs in the present.

i'm so impatient of getting 'waltz' manga once i reach nihon. i've been refraining myself for more than a year already when i always saw them at the rack in kinokuniya

wow, that's long when talking about books alone!

so, i also watch an anime. it's actually from a year or two before but i hadn't had the chance to watch it. it's 'Eden of the East', partially because the character design is the same like honey and clover, added with a strong story, this makes the anime among the top of my list. i pretty much had babbled abt the same stuff here, so to avoid the post from getting so long-winded, i better end it now.

lastly, a little member of our big family who i can only see again in 2 years time. it's my cousin's newly-born baby deep in sleep after getting so worked up in the night. see you again, zikri!

wishing everyone a safe flight!

心細い

2011-04-12T01:22:00.000+09:00

the clock's ticking. yet, i'm so vulnerable to procrastination

current state: anxious

for a lot of reasons, i think i'm becoming more unsociable. i don't know. it's a hassle to care about others or more accurately to have to think about what they think. it's unnecessary but inevitably it's going to haunt the simple head of mine. perhaps, when we are taught not to be a nuisance to others, that naturally comes in.

ironically, i always am a nuisance.

courage is sometimes so far away.

i type things down and i erase them all back. and the same things repeats again and again. what's actually there to be scared of? i always criticize myself that i'm just being over-conscious. but to be seen as a fool is definitely something i'd like to avoid. at times like these that i felt like i understood why there are so many art pieces that are just beyond understanding. it's the yearning to be looked, to have someone's attention but the fear of being seen all through is just colossal. rejection is plainly frightening.

okay, i gotta stop. i don't know what i'm writing anymore, it's getting nonsensical.

十夜

2011-04-06T18:18:00.006+09:00

now it really is only 10 nights away.

if anyone ever watch ayashino ceres, you know what character i'm thinking about now.

ok, back to the main topic, it's unfortunate that i can't reunite with all 84 of us who are going. and some of them will live not so close that will allow me to always meet them. yes, i'm sad. my flight's gonna be the last one, in Saturday night of april 16th. a few classes gonna be skipped inevitably. but i don't think i can blame it on this if later i can't cope with the lessons, or can i?

and one funny thing when the person from ypm called to inform me on the matter yesterday, it was told also about our attire for the flight. not only they make us wearing suits as to make it so formal, but also black scarf. i ask him "really? black scarf? with black suits? are we attending japanese funeral?" (coz if it's funeral which i used to go, it's light-colored clothes, but for japanese, it's black. now, let's just hope none of the boys gonna turn up wearing black neckties)

perfect with the recent disaster where everyone's grieving, and we are showing we are too.

so, that's one thing settled, no need for me to go all anxious of when is it exactly i'm going. but i actually forgot about the flumpool's dvd and only get that thing settled today-the release day. it all boils down to luck now whether i could get the first-press edition or not though i badly want that one.

btw, yesterday was also the day when i think library is not exactly a ~~bad~~ plain boring place after all. well, if you're going to the correct one. i guess i could spend my remaining week there in jfkl library, and it only lies next to the midvalley. i could finish a few manga series and some haruki murakami's novel without having to buy it. well, as much as i love kinokuniya for it's mountain of books i have interest in, i hate it when i splurge my money each time.

as i've mentioned somewhere b4, my goal of at least a book month is somehow accomplished so far. well, it's april and i've finished 5 books until now this is excluding the loads of manga which can also considered books. my favourite so far is definitely 'the curious incident of the dog in the night-time' by mark haddon. i always love when books are narrated in 1st person view. and as neil gaiman said it, unlike tv, words from the book are built into a world of your own, where you're one of the characters. it certainly holds true in a way. i also finished a book i bought a while back, 'Johnny and the bomb', terry pratchett still haven't failed to disappoint me in this one. and at kino, there's 25% discount for Randa Abdel Fattah's first book, well, i ended up reading her 2nd book-'Ten Things I Hate About Me'. all i was about to say is for the above 3 books, i love them!

and i got a feeling if there's any manga or movie i want to savour, now's the time. it'll be hectic once i reached nihon. well, i just wish i'll still be able to watch sakura in bloom. and i actually got a consolation word that in up north, sakura still blooms in May-and do i have time then??talking about movie, they're showing this in malaysia starting tomorrow-thanks to someone who reminded me of this. yeay, matsuyama kenichi in action-he's also in norwegian wood movie but i'm yet to watch that though it's been sitting in my external hard disk for a while now.

from zero to unknown

2011-03-20T01:32:00.002+09:00

the countdown just adds up to a yet-to-be-determined number.

the fact that it was postponed indeed was a relief to a lot of people. but i'm sure if not all, some from the 84 of us know how it feels at the moment, after surviving the 3 long hard years.

mata mataserareta.

i fully understand this is all beyond our control. the plan was nicely done, yet He knows better and the most powerful.

patience is the key now....

p/s: when i thought surely my post count will rocket up this month, seems like the complete opposite happens. even from the previous one, it took me more than 10 days. okay, i did actually wrote down a bit here, can't deny how the recent disaster really affects me.

hopefully i'll make it in time to pack stuff.

and i'm wondering why the fonts are reverted back to how it was. is it only my browser or the blogger are disabling the ones i've set?

inexplicable

2011-03-10T00:08:00.002+09:00

from tomorrow the countdown will be left as a single digit.

it's hard to describe how i am feeling at the moment.

today was the graduation ceremony. not much to be said, it went as how it's expected to be.

maybe, except this:

poor us, we were to be robbed!! thankfully none of our valuables items are gone, lol. as people say, laughter's the best medicine, they do know how to make us laugh~

i'm grateful enough the robe this time is not that bad. as compared to some memory i have from years ago. perhaps, this'll be the last we'll be putting on such attire. surely, in nihon, there's none of this.

actually, what to be said is so much more but it's just difficult to put those in words.

arigatou?

and i just found this song sound so soothing-like how spitz's songs always do, it's like consoling the current me at the moment when i'm feeling not so good for no particular reason

iro iro

2011-03-05T20:21:00.004+09:00

yesterday, quite unplanned, i bought 2 more books

this morning, i finished reading one of them

i found out that i can easily finish books that are newly-bought. with probability of 1 to 2.

hopefully i'll start on that other book soon.

btw, for the one i just finished, i think i won't mind reading it again. i'll even consider bringing that along with me to the land of rising sun. this was my 3rd attempt of getting in haruki murakami's world. unlike the first two that i read, this one is non-fictional.

the content is just like what the title says. it's about running. actually just recently i was seriously thinking of starting getting my body in shape by the simplest means i can think of-jogging. and yesterday my meeting with this book is like fated, it's like saying to me, "don't let that thought be left only as thought realize it!"

and as for the rest of the book, it tells about the author himself how the very running influences him and his career. if i want to quote from the book, it's too much that are worthy to list here. it might not be an exaggeration if i say this book can be considered as a self-help book.

even more helping when i didn't have to buy at a hiking price it always is. for the first time i stepped into book xcess in amcorp mall, pj. if only i've gone there a lot earlier....

so, including that, my yesterday was great.

and it took a rollercoaster ride today. honestly, i feel very bad now. for several reasons i've yet to resolve.

even the thought that i'll be going to my dreamed nihon for real in only about 2 weeks from now doesn't make me feel better.

aargh

a stupid situation

2011-03-03T16:39:00.000+09:00

no need to say, i don't like to cook nor do i know how

but today, i have been having the same food for 3 meals straight: yesterday's breakfast-lunch-dinner, today's brunch. the instant capati from the freezer, scrambled egg and baked bean from the can.

at least i thought of ringing some delivery service. my phone's battery's dead. and i'm not sure whether this house has its phone or not-i've had my friend giving the house a call but i don't hear a thing. perhaps, i should walk a bit until the nearest shop, yet the grill's locked and i have no key.

i have 5 raw chickens in the fridge.

go ahead, laugh.

in the end, i resorted to online order of domino's pizza. fervently staring at the monitor of the cctv feed showing the front gate of the house.

p/s: now it's holiday, a lot of people is updating blogs-thus explaining the recent surge of posts. happy to read all those though^^

3月9日 -sangatsu kokonoka-

2011-03-02T21:23:00.003+09:00

sounds familiar?

at first i didn't realize it, until one of our TA's asked me when the graduation day is going to be, i just plainly answered "sangatsu kokonoka desu". then, i burst into laughter. it's a coincidence, yes, but it certainly makes me want to sing this particular song on that day. well, that's not going to happen though, with the official ceremony and all. and i still find it silly that we have that mortar board - okay, i only cared that it would ruin the curve at my scarf.

and... patiently waits for that mere 1.5k　みんな、我慢しないとね
in that while, i filled my time watching dramas and stuff. hope everyone has an enjoyable holiday!!!

thus, the remaining 3 weeks

2011-03-01T17:11:00.000+09:00

as expected from JAD, throughout the whole 3 years of this program, even the longest holiday we can ever have would be only about 3 weeks.

yes, 3 weeks left until my scheduled flight. and it's not precisely a full 3week holiday, we still have one more thing unfinished, and that'll be our convocation on this march 9th.

actually, it hasn't dawned on me yet, the fact that i'm really going somewhere far away. when people ask how am i feeling, honestly i can't quite answer it coz i still feel like nothing has changed. and i haven't even started with the preparation, perhaps that explains why. okay, i did already buy a few things.

yet, when i thought i want to do a looott of things, currently it seems like i'm soo free, i don't know what to do. more like, i can't do much given the state i am (so little money, cannot drive, not everyone is free to spend time with me and so on)

what i achieved so far is getting a few gadgets into my collections, reading the flumpool interviews in the magazines i bought recently and a few chapters of 『魔王』which i also bought the other day.

and i'm hungry

nineteen hundred

2011-02-28T23:23:00.000+09:00

that's no random number. i'm heavily hoping for something to put me in relief there.

so, what makes me excited for today is... i'm typing this in my brand new netbook!! this really feels different, when it's me alone who makes the decision. it was quite spontaneous, or not coz i'm sure i've checked this exact model in the internet before but i did not even give it much thought. yet, this is the one i brought home in the end.

yeah, it's plain black. nor did i seek anything fancy.

call me spendthrift or whatever because actually that was not the sole purchase i did for the day. there follows another gadgets which i'll be delighted to disclose later.

i'm happy~

photo express

2011-02-26T01:48:00.001+09:00

5 of us, the happy housemates during dinner the other day

but i guess i love this photo the most for such an obvious reason^^

an unexpected night out with these wonderful pals

a pizza party with shirin sensei!

みんな、おつかれ！

2011-02-24T07:50:00.004+09:00

specially dedicated to all my JAD nakama and all my friends wherever you are.

i'm gonna miss them~

so, what's next?

2011-02-19T03:51:00.001+09:00

nihon?

actually there're quite a lot of stuff in prior to that. surely, we are now filled with ambivalent emotions. but for me at the moment, i'm plainly relieved that i'm finally spared from the hellish exam (yes, i use that word again)

today, aside from that final paper, a lot of stuff ran through my mind. i mean random stuff like what usually filled this head of mine. sometimes i find myself so vulnerable to any distraction when i'm the middle of something else because i tend to think to hard, it sometimes too tiring to do what i originally about to do by then. call me silly, but that's who i am.

but one thing that attracted my attention was when i visited our university library in the morning to prepare before entering the exam hall. like any library do, books are what they contain and i can't help peeking my heads on the racks especially the japanese ones. here's where i discovered an interesting children's picture book. it's actually a simple story told in a simple way, yet it leaves quite an impression. a big one.

the title in english would be "What is it like?". if i were to tell about the content, it'll spoil everything for those who haven't read it yet. what i can say is you can hardly predict such a story it has here. it'll make you dumbfounded for a while and it'll strike something inside and leads you think further and deeper, it's visceral(yeay, i can finally use this word!). and it subtly highlights how imagination is truly a powerful tool-something we think we have perfectly known all along but tend to heedlessly forget when struggling to get through everyday lives. quite a brilliant work. aside from that, one of the prominent message might be about our perceptions towards the less-fortunate people. like in here, the emerging characters are people from this group whom most of us has little encounter with and very little thoughts about them. usually, most of us would only think about how pitiful they are and it only stops there, no more than that. the thing is if we care to take a little more time to delve deeper we'll discover more than we can ever think. thus, the gist of it all, THINK!

that exact theme reminds me so much of my Maou: Juvenile Remix manga. aahh, i really will reread them this holiday

seems like this post will still be longer from now on, exam's over after all.

so, once i finished reading about that, it's sharing session, right? my friends are as touched as me too with the picture book. and another stuff arises from there. from our limited japanese material, we came to our naive conclusion that japan's children books are indeed rich with such stuff, i mean something with human touch and goes deep rather than superficial and silly stories (is that really the case though?). well, based in our experience when we were young, that is. if i could recall, what i was exposed to was ladybird's 'peter and jane', or the malay stories would be 'pak pandir' or 'pak kaduk' or 'si kancil' renowned from old tales and stuff similar to that. later it goes to something more knowledge-based materials like figuring out how rain forms and stuff like that. i won't really say i did read encyclopedia even though it's lined up nicely on the rack which i only realized of their existence quite later, but i was attracted to animal stuff especially with stunning photos. oh yeah, i did once inspired to be photographer for national geographic.

that's all now still left as a dream far to be realized. and i'm now apparently treading on another kind of path.

probably this is only me who's oblivious to the true situation, but what i feel is that in my current society, we are so in a rush to reach such development where industry and economy are the vital core, hence we lack with people that focuses on the counterpart of it, the human part, to shape people into becoming people who care to think, not programmed robots. certainly there are those people but still, the former far outweighs the later thus the unbalance. okay, i'm in no position to say further, i'm no philosophical expert and my knowledge of the world might not be greater than that of 'katak bawah tempurung'. i can't analyse whatsoever and whatsoever with no data (hahaha, i actually said this, this is so science student?). here, what i mean is, i got a lot more to discover, the whole expanse of the world which takes more than a lifetime to figure out.

i'm looking forward to nihon.

nice timing!!

2011-02-14T23:44:00.002+09:00

well, i think i don't have to explain what happened today, just browse around my coursemates' blog for today's date and you can easily figure it out.

the thing is, i hardly fell so much into a pit, various things cheered me up!

the first thing is definitely my sensei-tachi. their words certainly are really encouraging and for some bits help me to laugh out loud. i would treasure those for a very long time to come for sure. i'm glad i happened to read those today after the adversity that fell upon us today.

#2, listening to flumpool's 'hana ni nare' lifts up my spirit yet again. like i said, what a nice timing that the song came to my ears exactly when i'm not at the best moment. along with ryuuta's mellifluous voice and the encouraging lyrics that strides along the whole song, it throws my anxiety away for now. even if i flung today, i can still bloom for another day, yeay Hana ni Nare!

#3, after returning home, as i've promised myself, i allow myself to touch this beloved notebook of mine after todays ~~hellish~~ paper and pamper myself with dramas and stuff (as a sort of consolation and tomorrow's holiday after all). so i decided to watch the one i already got stored in this for a while now-the main reason i have it is that it starred Mukai Osamu. oh my, i'm sooo into him now(followed with Okada Masaki and few others), he's among the most refreshing actors in Nihon right now. well almost all of my entertainment are Nihon stuff. so, what i watched for today was a movie titled "5 Nen go no Love Letter"/Love Letters for 5 Years Later. to say accurately, it's not a movie, it's originally a 12 mini episodes from some kind of handphone tv channel. it's a story about a father who does not even stand a chance to meet his son as he dies before the child is born but he already planned a surprise for the child and the mother which takes place 5 years after his death.

this story strongly reminds me of "P.S I Love You" the part with letters containing missions to be done whilst the sender is no longer in this world. but this story still does not lose of its own charms, and of course tear-jerking! for me who can only easily shed bead of tear (notice the singular form here) for dorama has indeed shed a whole lot for this one-my cheeks literally wet. one thing i notice about tear-jerking moment is that it's more often void of words. just uttering a line and then a moment of stillness with face expression perfectly matched to the situation is enough to break the dam of the tears down. the little boy's character also livens up the whole story. and he's cute to look at! (of course Mukai Osamu also never fails me in that area). in conclusion, i gotta say i love this story.

here's the early part of the story-sorry no english sub:

even only after about 3 minutes from the beginning, i can easily feel the tear brims, that's one touching scene

yes, it's setsunai (my vocabulary is shrinking further now when i can only think up of words of another language than the one i'm using at the moment).

p/s: this is totally trivial over here, the title of the upcoming new song from weaver did make me smile too. Ao iro Graffiti/Blue Grafitti, i'm wondering what kind of lyrics it'll contain this time, i always love songs from them, i respect Kawabe for being such a good song writer.

there'll be no more of this in nihon (really?)

2011-02-03T22:07:00.000+09:00

a recent mail in my inbox:

As a frequent customer of Domino's, it gives us great pleasure to provide you with this exclusive offer:
Free Garlic Twisty Bread

the point is not that mere thing they offer me, it's the fact that i've been quite dependent on them all this while, lol

i wonder if i can still order like this in the future. hahaha, i better learn how to cook for myself from now on

of studying and eating and fangirling

2011-02-03T21:38:00.000+09:00

i was determined not to even mention about the upcoming event next week in my blog here

it doesn't stop me from being miserable because of it though

based from my little experience i have, i'm not exactly a person who can perform during the final streaks

that indeed makes me anxious

O Lord, grant me strength

coz words are powerful

2011-01-23T16:53:00.001+09:00

my word of the day : visceral

vis·cer·al
[vis-er-uhl] –adjective

1.of or pertaining to the viscera.
2.affecting the viscera.
3.of the nature of or resembling viscera.
4.characterized by or proceeding from instinct rather thanintellect: a visceral reaction.
5.characterized by or dealing with coarse or base emotions;earthy; crude: a visceral literary style.

source: www.dictionary.com

p/s: i'm still contemplating whether i should buy a new electronic dictionary which i insist to get the latest one possible....

what you give, you get back?

2011-01-22T21:42:00.001+09:00

well, that phrase is kinda famous, isn't it? like 'what goes around comes around', something like that

i don't know if it's just me being paranoid, but if i'm harboring such feelings inside here right now towards others, it means likely i've made others felt the same way towards me before. so, i was quite a jerk, ain't i? and the funny thing is, when i'm expecting this much from others and can't help being intimidated at most times, there were people expecting much of me or be intimidated by me? hahaha, what a conceited thought that'll be for i am truly nothing to be proud of.

why is it so hard to be honest? why is it so difficult to overcome that fear? the fear to confront the averse truth that are preferably not to be known. or, is it only mere presumptions? nevertheless, unsettledness never ceases.

what it takes is only a tip of courage-the very thing that's absent at the moment it's needed the most

patience is the key

2011-01-21T20:30:00.000+09:00

iman, there's barely a month left before you are finally liberated.

be patient!

ganbare!!!

日本に行く前に、しておきたいこと

2011-01-11T22:31:00.001+09:00

今日、日本研究の授業でそんなことが持ち出された。

まあ、日本に行く予定は後数週間だもんね。砂時計もう動いた。

さて、何しよう？

まず、旅行！もう二十年マレーシアにいるのに、いろいろのところまだ行ってないし、近いといっても時間とかお金とかのことで、行く機会がなくて。せっかくだから、できるだけ行きたいな。次は私は今一番行きたいところ：

KLCC Bridge
Kuala Selangor Firefly Sanctuary
I-City
Aquaria(もう行ったけど、また行きたい)
Langkawi(本当の旅行の意味でね、前は学校のことで2年も住んでいたけどあまり満喫できなかった)

そして、読みかけた小説を全部読み終わりたい。きついかな？多いんだもん。

ああ、まだやりたいものもあるけど、今に限って頭から出ないな。

私のJADの仲間の皆さんはどう？

やりたいものやれますように～

p/s: 今、フランプールのことすごい夢中になって、新しいアルバムが待ち遠しなあ。

christmas+new year holiday

2011-01-04T23:30:00.002+09:00

though i don't celebrate christmas, it doesn't mean i escape from being happy for it, i got holiday!!!

so, for this short interval of holiday we have, despite having schoolworks in hand, i prefer enjoying it to the fullest.

checklist 1: my sis's reception

the last time we got the whole family united was how many years ago i wonder, and this time it's quite a special occasion as it's the celebration for my sis's wedding. i haven't met her for nearly 2 years actually. well, when my dad said it's not gonna be that big of an event, it still ended up not to be that small. apart form my close relatives, there were also lots of others like my parents' acquaintances which majorly unknown to me. with my dad's recent road accident, a lot of guests were coming. and to add to that, i'm sure they're just curious to see the groom. they must've expected some truly caucasian-look guy, but believe it or not, my bro in-law can have the look of any ethnic, contrary to that expectation LOL.

this was captured at the end of the event, so unfortunately this does not exactly include my whole close relatives. funny when endou-san joked with me whether i can really remember all of my cousins' names, of course i do! ok, not their full names though :P (this is only part of relatives from my dad's side). if we were to combine the whole relatives both from my dad's and mom's side, the lens just won't fit. hahaha

checklist 2: a bit of KL walk

believe it or not, i've never been to KL Tower for twenty years i've been living in its vicinity. this time, for we were showing KL around to my bro in-law who finally set foot to Malaysia for the first time, i got the chance to be up in the air above 200ft (or do i get this wrong?). definitely, i won't refuse to go there again, or better, to go to any other towers to watch such a spectacular sight. it's amazing! apart from that, we also went around other places such as pavillion KL and KLCC. well, i don't know much places of interests in KL if you were to ask me besides the numerous shopping complexes it possesses. but still, next time, i'll be getting to the KLCC bridge for sure.

checklist 3 : new year countdown at Singapore!

this is what i looked forward the most. what makes this so exciting is that it's like our siblings' retreat~ well, it's actually was kinda a honeymoon trip for my sis and her husband, but we also tagged along for the later half of their trip. they had arrived there earlier so we only stayed for a night there to catch the countdown fireworks. it really was a wholesome trip after all. i love it go out with my sis as she would always suggest to stop for food every once in a while. in fact, we had 4 snack stops besides the main dinner-seafood! Singapore is really a nice city. it's clean! (in contrary to some city i'm used to) some people say you can see the city at its dirtiest during new year celebration, yet what i witnessed was that the road-cleaning-machines were already at work barely hours after the countdown. well, how i exactly saw those operating at those hours was because we were actually down at the streets to walk from where we watch the fireworks to our hotel which we reached at 4:30 a.m. lesson i learnt: if you wanna watch fireworks, book hotel nearby the venue. there were just no cabs available for us at the time so we had to drag our feet from clarke's quay to orchard road. nevertheless, it was an interesting night walk.

checklist 4: drama

i got to complete some of the dramas during the break. secret garden is by far the most anticipated drama. oh my, they're really brilliant actors/actresses! adding to that, as a girl i can't be escaped to be enchanted by the hotness of the actors~~

checklist 5: books

i borrowed a few books from sensei the other day and i got to go through 2 of them. 'nihonjin no shiranai nihongo' is so funny! and i got a lot of new infos as well, those things related to that complicated language. it's actually a manga strip collections, accompanied by few compositions regarding particular topics. and interesting read. and the other one of the same genre is 'rikei no hitobito'. truthfully i'm still halfway for this one. nevertheless, it gave me a good laugh how the mangaka puts the life of a science-stream people. for some parts, it might not get to you (the joke), but if you think further, you'll find how amusing it is.

the done list 2010

2011-01-03T00:11:00.004+09:00

*in the end, due to some miscalculation, this entry was up later than i planned, it's already 2011*

long ago, i've thought of making this kind of entry where i would list out all what i've read and watched throughout the whole year. well, and this kinda made me torn whether to post this here in blogger where my real life are much more enclosed or the other channel i use in my livejournal account where it encompasses more on the subject of my fancy-for instance my fandom on flumpool.

but then, i don't sense the line distinguishing the two of them, what i like is pretty much what makes up my life, isn't it. like how i learn and improve my Japanese language skill majorly owing to engrossing in too much dramas. or how i maintained my English skill from rusting away by reading novels-though i don't think this really worth much praise.

so much of an intro there. basically it's a list of books i read, dramas and movies i watched in year 2010-listed chronologically.

novels i read:
Nation by Terry Pratchett
Twenties Girl by Sophie Kinsella
The Unadulterated Cat by Terry Pratchett
The Winner Stands Alone by Paulo Coelho
The Fifth Elephant by Terry Pratchett
Ahiru to Kamo no Coin Locker by Isaka Kotaro
The Chronicle of Wind-up Bird by Haruki Murakami
Blind Willow, Sleeping Woman by Haruki Murakami
The White Tiger by Aravind Adiga
Children by Isaka Kotaro
The Newton Letter by John Banville
The Melancholy Death of Oyster Boy by Tim Burton
Mini Shopaholic by Sophie Kinsella
I Shall Wear Midnight by Terry Pratchett
Noah Barleywater Runs Away by John Boyne
The Little Prince by St. Exupery (reread)
[manga]Maou:Juvenile Remix (the whole 10 volumes)
Nihonjin no Shiranai Nihongo
Rikei no Hitobito

novels halfway read (hopefully soon to be resumed):
-American Gods by Neil Gaiman (carried on from the previous year)
-The Graveyard by Neil Gaiman
-The Last Continent by Terry Pratchett
-Have a Little Faith by Mitch Albom

movies watched(as in going to cineplex):
Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatball
The Vampire's Assistant
Sherlock Holmes
The Imaginarium of Dr Parnassus
Case 39
Alice In Wonderland 3D
How To Train Your Dragon
Clash Of The Titans 3D
Woochi
Kaiji
Kick Ass
Shrek Forever After
Letters To Juliet
The Sorcerer's Apprentice
Inception
Shanghai
Salt
The Last Airbender
Devil
Wall Street 2: Money Never Sleeps
Harry Potter 7:Part 1
Rapunzel: Tangled
Tron

movie watched via other channels (dvds or in the comp):
Satorare Movie
Jyuuryoku Pierrot
Ahiru To Kamo No Coin Locker
Oto Na Ri
Honokaa Boy
Fish Story
A Cheerful Gang Turns The Earth
Dream
Big River
Ai No Mukidashi
Rookies Sotsugyou
Platonic Sex
20th Century Boys: Our Flag
Black Gaisha Ni Tsutomerundaga Mou Genkai Kamo
Go
Boku no Hatsukoi wo Kimi ni Sasagu
My Girlfriend is an Agent
Tada Kimi wo Aishiteru
Children
supposed to be a lot more but somehow i lost track of them

Dramas watched (complete episodes):
Bloody Monday 2
Boss
Samurai High School
Tokujou Kabachi
Hello My Lady(Korea)
Iryu2
Shinzanmono
Team Batista 2: General Rouge No Gaisen
Sunao Ni Narenakute
Mother
Hammer Session
Hotaru No Hikari 2
Gold
Atami No Sousakan
Unubore Deka
Shibatora
10nen Saki Mo Kimi Ni Koishite
At Home Dad
Keizoku 2: Spec -my top drama of the year
Himitsu
Nagareboshi
Ogon No Buta
Perfect Report
Yankee-Kun To Megane-Chan
My Girlfriend is a Gumiho (Korea)
Gakeppuchi no Eri

Dramas watched halfway or yet to finish:
-Tsuki No Koibito (not that aroused to watch till finish)
-Liar Game 2 (this just so monotone in a way)
-Angel Bank (the wordings just too hard)
-Tumbling (still not past the first 2 episodes)
-Moyashimon (too much bio terms with no available subtitles)
-Nihonjin no Shiranai Nihongo (interesting but internet not that allowing)
-Natsu ha Nijiiro ni Kagayaku (boring?)
-Face Maker (maamaa, okay for relaxed watching)
-Iryuu 3 (still watching, waiting for subtitles)
-Freeter, Ie Wo Kau (still watching, waiting for subtitles)
-Shiroi Haru (skipped here and there during 1st episode, perhaps not now?)
-Secret Garden (Korea) (still airing)

of only i could offer as much attention towards my studies......

singapore was awesome!!

2011-01-01T21:15:00.000+09:00

that's exactly what i'm feeling at the moment. and as the result, i'm so exhausted now.

details would be in future post(s).

やっぱり、花火は最高～～～

CRIB

2010-12-17T00:24:00.000+09:00

well, certainly not the MTV CRIBS though i really wish i have a home like those featured in that.

and also not the crib they use to put the babies in to make them sleep.

it's just a word i'm particularly interested after recently discovering the use of it. it's a hospital term which stands for 'Complete Rest In Bed'. somehow it's cute seeing the close similarity to its literal meaning. isn't it?

so, updating with my current life, after i received the great news the other day, a quite-not-so-good news followed. i got a call informing that my father was in an car accident. a head-on collision which results with two wrecked cars, causing a few casualties. as there was a death involved, thankfully my dad is among those who survived. and as of now, he's still hospitalized for the injuries are yet to heal. thus, my discovery of the above mentioned term.

hopefully, his recovery will progress smoothly. thanks for a lot of people who gives their concern.

so, i just have to continue on with my life which means i have to be more serious towards studying? oh,how i've been slacking off a whole lot recently, and without me realizing it, it's gonna be the final exam so soon. and now, i DO worry. unlike before where it's others who did the worrying for me.

but as my senior advised, "don't be panic"

okay, after all, to be calm is important in such circumstance. breathe in....breath out............
i need more flumpool input.

-3 months to go-

alhamdulillah

2010-12-10T23:13:00.001+09:00

certainly, i'm in a very good mood at the moment compared to the other times i always wrote down any entry here

happy to not even care whether the sentence i structured makes sense or not

just today, i got a lot of stimuli that affect how am i feeling now

like how i discovered, someone from my old school, the same grade as me is actually getting married so soon!!

that really caught me unguarded

or after a long while i haven't so into korean drama, today i got stuck at one and can't help laughing

and laugh, and laugh

or finished yet another book i've been looking forward for quite some time, terry pratchett never fails to make such stories that will make me hooked and amazed. and even better i love that touch he did at the ending of 'I Shall Wear Midnight'. that was simple yet sooo sweet, and it's not even a love story but it just perfectly ends well. yosh, i could embark on the next book now. call it seasonal or whatever, i'm simply enjoying it!

but, what tops the list for the day definitely the one that put me is sooo much relief after a long while of anxiousness and anticipation. i got accepted!!!!! just received the acceptance letter in my hand in the afternoon, and never thought the documents included would be that much, well, that's what i gotta do from now on.

i gotta thank a lot of people for this.

i wonder if getting this kind of news can make someone so happy, how about all the other things that are much more than this? no wonder they can coin the word 'on cloud nine' which i used to think senseless at one time. what a good thing to be happy, i wish everyone can be happy too!! it fills your heart with delight you can't help but to beam a smile so sincere without ever having to strain it or feign it in any way. cheers!

on edge

2010-12-06T00:42:00.001+09:00

a short account of what happened during the weekend (or what i thought at the beginning, but it still ended up quite long)

Saturday. the day before JLPT. i believe if not all, almost everybody in JAD was bound at TBP for the sake of studying for the test. so, when i stepped into Sunway Pyramid, there was no familiar face at all, usually it's very rare not to find someone there. somehow, it feels weird. i was out there for ice-skating, something i planned earlier that week. it sure is unhealthy for me to continue being at TBP for so many weekends, so i gotta be somewhere else doing things i enjoy no matter what. rejected by any fellow JAD, i ended up going with my sister and one of the TA's who bothered to wake up in early morning. well, ice-skating sure is difficult though but it feels exciting when you achieve to at least skate. u're only depending on two thin blades under your feet! nevertheless, i could only get as far as moving at a speed no greater than a turtle unlike my companions who joyfully slide through the throng of people, sometimes leaving me helpless. at times, i do feel sorry for Endo-san who would follow with my pace closely behind. it sure made me glad as if i'm being protected. mission accomplished for the day! not without falling down for numerous times. next time i'll practice more until i can do it effortlessly :)

Sunday. JLPT-KinoKuniya-Rapunzel

somehow it made me feel relieved that i actually went out playing the previous day. it'll be of no use were i to be stuck in my room, my nose under those books. that was just way too difficult. even for me (hahaha, this sounds like i'm damn good) i could care less what the result would be. it won't even affect our university entrance or whatever. so, that was it. the next thing i realized was i was on a date with Fatin. :D i've always wanted to watch Rapunzel so i've made a reservation for it. it was only the two of us, everyone else seem like to have their own plans. thankfully the test venue was near enough to the lrt station, getting to klcc was a cinch. so, while waiting for the showtime, i went to my favourite place-as expected. and what a delight to see so much interesting books ON SALE. i'm a girl in essence and can't help but to be so much excited when discounts are concerned. I, who usually prefers paperbacks(they're cheaper and smaller) actually bought 2 hardcovers today and due to the temptations i can hardly resist, ended up buying 4 books altogether.

my cameraphone sucks so it's not that visible but what i got today was 'I Shall Wear Midnight' by Terry Pratchett, 'Mini Shopaholic' by Sophie Kinsella, 'My Mother She Killed Me, My Father He Ate Me' by various authors and 'Noah Barleywater Runs Away' by John Boyne. initially i thought of attempting another Isaka Kotaro's work when i heard the latest one is on sale, but it costs way too much over my budget! and it's also not that thin. aaa, just when will i be able to read those novel without much trouble? hopefully it'll be soon.

and Rapunzel sure is awesome!! Maximus is my favourite horse in all the stories i've watched so far.
so, next i'll be looking forward to Narnia! fantasy livens up our lives, isn't it??

just want to express my gratitude for the above things which will be very beneficial to me indeed^^

ありふれてる言葉だけど

2010-12-01T00:40:00.004+09:00

心からありがとう！

いろいろの人にそう言いたい。

だって、私は今まで生きていて、今の自分のようになっても、彼らのおかげだから。

ありがとうな

家族とか、この言葉は正直に言いにくいけどね。

後何十年もこの言葉が言い切れないでしょう。

じゃあ、これからもよろしく！(^ _ ^)/

ろうそくはもうフォークになった（’-’*)

二十歳になった私は今本当に大人になったのかな。。。悩みなどがいっぱいあるけどそれは人生というものだからね

あと十年の私はどんな人になるだろう、どのぐらい変わるかな。あの時、今を持っている夢がどうなるか待ち遠しね　（*＾＾*)

p/s: i made a lil experiment and i don't know how far it proves my hypothesis to be true but social websites do make people rely too much on its existence. i'm relieved there are still people who apparently make the effort to remember their friend's birthday, i'm touched~

and oh yeah, i got quite the first present today-a full version PV of flumpool's latest song「Snowy Nights Serenade～心までも繋ぎたい～ Xmas ver.」! aaah, i'm really a sucker for ballads, this song sticks right away, what more Ryuuta's voice just bind a spell on me the moment it reaches my eardrum. really wish i could see him face to face and listening to them performing live. that gotta be the best birthday present ever! /edited on dec 1st

let me do this in 10 minutes

2010-11-28T19:20:00.003+09:00

yes, it's hectic times like this that i suddenly want to post an entry while having one whole report left undone.

but here i go, i went off wiki-ing some trivial stuff. (funny how wiki-ing sounds so acceptable as googling does)

there, i lost 2 minutes.

so, what i browsed about was Daruma Dolls. actually, i've been asking some people who are coming back from japan to get me this as omiyage. and of course, they just didn't find it and i got something else.

i mean, isn't this unique stuff is visible everywhere when i watch their dorama or whatever. is it so difficult to be found?

i found it really interesting to how they use the doll. to people who doesn't know, originally the eyes are blank and when one makes a wish, they colour one eye, and only after the wish is fulfilled the other is coloured. omoshiroi. somehow, it can be a reminder you still have to push more effort in pursuing what you desire.

so, back to why it's hard to find, i discover that 80% of the doll production is at Takasaki (Gunma Prefecture, north of Tokyo) source<---check this out! no wonder they couldn't find it easily, the people i asked it from lived so far from the said place.

okay, i got only a minute left.

so, eventually i passed the time limit i set for this by 8 minutes, it's because i thought of putting a screenshot of a dorama where i saw the most amazing form the daruma has taken, but i just couldn't remember of which episode it's featured in.

instead, i found this when i googled. look at those mini tiny ones below them all.

so, later folks!

nearing defeat

2010-11-28T09:05:00.000+09:00

this might be recurring every so often, and i despise myself each time it happens

i can't focus on what i really should do.

instead i'll be distracted to plenty other stuff of no beneficial. including what i'm exactly doing here-writing a blog.

it's frustrating.

hopefully, my report will be able to be completed fully and without much fuss while there's only barely a day left, to include there's also the presentation slides to be done.

ok, enough of that.

mou, ganbaru shika nai

this is what i should stick in mind

btw,some time ago, i finally get my japan map in my own room (*^-^*)

and lastly, let's see in a few days who is it that actually remembers or makes the effort to remember............

海+月=?

2010-11-24T22:33:00.003+09:00

海月

it's read as くらげ (kurage)

well, the kanji, one by one brings the meaning of 'sea' and 'moon'

combined, it means jellyfish.

a creature that majorly consist of water and little of everything else. fleeting through the waters like nothing else matters.

it reminds me of our visit to JIMAH power plant, where i got a glimpse of the above mentioned creature but quite different to my usual image of it. never did i know there would be one of this size. i did only watch from above when it fleeted near the surface of the water but i guess the full picture must be something like this.

it's still jellyfish, yes.

ok, i prefer to be near to the ones in the first picture, or more accurately i'd love to simply watch them, though people might say i better do many other things than that. but, animals just soothe you in a way you can hardly comprehend why. they just do. that's what great about God's creations. All praises to Him, Subhanallah~

and the reason why my interest perked up to this creature out of a sudden is because of the following.

yes, i'm absorbed in drama yet again. this time it's Nagareboshi (among other dramas i'm engrossed at the moment). a bittersweet love story enough to keep my interest aroused and maintained. at times painful, at times funny. and call me a girl because i really am one, i can't escape from being mesmerized.

like here's what i call marvel of God's creations. XD somehow he constantly reminds me of someone so close though. guess who? hehehe

grumbles

2010-11-22T23:41:00.000+09:00

if i were to blurt out the following orally to my friends, i'm sure i'll be bashed or just plainly ignored. now, i'm grateful for the presence of what we call blog. it's regarding the JLPT. today, we did the last year's paper, and frankly, i'll say, that's just WAY TOO DIFFICULT. for the current me, at least. okay, that's what i wanna say about the matter. now, i can barely see any light of hope of me passing at this rate, and the new format N1 model paper does not seem easier.

and what i answered to the interviewer for the university entrance : the subject i like/good at -> nihongo

well, i'm not lying. i do enjoy all the thing i'm able to do following to learning it.

i could understand the dramas!! well, though not fully. but it sure leads to the addict i'm having at the moment.

and understanding those lovely lyrics from songs i love to listen. but still, i'm amazed to Ryuuta's style, the more reason i'm so desperate to be better in nihongo. Flumpool, just wait to the day i could watch you perform live...

Okada Masaki made me watch a drama about tax - a topic never occur to me. He's such a hottie~

and actually, i intended of doing my report tonight....

p/s: i need to grab a book now. ah~ how much i want 'I Shall Wear Midnight' at the moment.

what i had on Saturday

2010-11-21T03:59:00.000+09:00

since early morning, it's a day filled with entrance interviews & written exam, never lacks of its own nervousness, yet still amused to find one of the persons in charge as a very nice eye candy XD

hopes everything goes all right, not just for me, for the rest of us too.

but the fact is we're still far from being able to be relieved even after we would get the result for university entrance, we still have a few months to finish the current semester. with its own mind-boggling subjects to overcome.

and today, i had my regular dose of drama. you should never stop practicing, right? next week(precisely tomorrow), we gonna have a mock exam for jlpt. it seems to be last year paper. quite strange, now the one we gonna actually sit this year would be of revised new format though. but i guess the contents are still relevant, so why bother?

later, i searched around to expand my drama inventory. and sure, i did find some. there'll be day where i'll do dramarathon very soon.

and a burger for dinner.

a nap after a long day. emphasis: a NAP. coz it's only an hour. before i woke up to be startled for it was already 11 p.m.

and we already bought ticket for Harry Potter which showtime is 11:30. nevertheless, we made it in time, skipping the intro.

-thought of writing down about the movie, but the words just don't seem to flow out-

though not really what i would deem a marvelous one, it's quite a nice watch. and i haven't seen any movie lately. well, it does make me look forward for the latter part of this 7th installation of the movie series. it would be when i'll be scheduled to be in nihon already. should i make an effort of watching previous ones that i missed?

i guess i'll still succumb to the habit of reading any subtitle available, even if it would be japanese.

i should learn listening properly. sorry for never being a good listener. i'm just not inclined to be so.

whatever crap i'm starting to write here, it's nearly 3 in the morning and my eyes is still wide open while my brain is showing signs of needing rest.

for today, i hope it'll be a sunny day. it's sunday after all. and whatever will be coming today, i'm wishing so that it'll be a happy one, something that could make me enjoy my day at least.

so, everyone, enjoy your day!

courage undetected

2010-11-15T21:15:00.001+09:00

Meiji University Interview　⇒ Saturday, Nov 20th 8:00 a.m
Saitama University Written Exam　⇒ same day, 9:00 a.m
Saitama University Interview　⇒ same day, between 1:00~4:00 p.m

mental preparation : still undetected (plausible radar damage)

Electrical Experiment report due --> tomorrow 5 p.m
progress : 66%

may everything goes all right, amin~

やる気、上がれ！！

2010-11-11T19:48:00.001+09:00

yosh, it's now the battle for the interview, yet while the person beside me is preparing for that sake, i'm still sticked here... like izaan said, there's one week more, no worry :P

so here, i'd like to share a quote i found somewhere, it's originally from a book which title i no longer could recall correctly.

You don’t quit practicing because you suck, you suck because you quit practicing.

You don’t play because you’re good. You’re good because you play.

You don’t run because you’re good at running, you’re good at running because you run.

somehow, recently it occurs upon me that actually all the bitter feelings/experiences/recollections i gathered so far were actually a valuable treasure. though many people prefer to eradicate those unpleasant things, it's because of the very existence of those that we mature and learn how to appreciate.

coz, i can never be good when i never do it, right? let alone be marvellous like how i perfectly won't mind being one.

so, from now on, no fear! (while inside i still shudder)

ya Allah, please assist me in all of what i do, grant me wisdom, grant me perseverance. i need nothing more than your blessings throughout my life. keep me safe and sound, and so my family and my dearest ones. keep our hearts clean from any evil, forever devoted only to you.

there's a lot to wish for

2010-11-10T23:04:00.001+09:00

if you get only a wish that'll be granted, what will you wish for?

that is one difficult question.....

i do have a lot that i want at the moment.

but first, we'd like to have problems to be cleared off our heads, right? perfectly, there's constantly a thing that is fleeting in my mind regarding what i believe is troubling me.

please, spare me of it.

sometimes i just want to whisk it off and make myself think that it's only me who creates the problem in my own head. the more i think about it, the more it is making a mess inside me. and naturally, it's not a thing you can easily put into words. yes, it's indescribable. but for sure, it's agitating.

perhaps i'm too much influenced with all the dramas i'm addicted with, my sense of logic might be far-fetched from what we call reality, the realm in which we're living in for real. and i'm overestimating things. for example, for a thing that supposed to be sufficient to make someone happy, still i'm expecting more and something just feels incomplete, in result i'm not that happy.

should i blame myself for being too much engrossed in dramas that it affects my thinking?

and what ceaselessly troubles me is when it comes about interpersonal stuff. easily said, i'm just clueless about the whole thing regarding it.

first thing, we have to consider others, and read their signals so as to make appropriate actions (for what purpose i'm still puzzled- is it not make them in unease or for solely not making a fool of own self?). but then i fear i misread those. i easily think the other party is not interested, so i should just shy away. in the end, it's me who feel lonely (somehow this word sounds too clichéd). however, there are times when i think if i can be this troubled, there must be others too having the same conflict (is there?). so if i change my position in the previously said situation, it might be me who makes others think the same thing as above. due to my inept self who hardly knows how to deal with people, i might unknowingly giving such unintended signals making them shy away instead. and the exact same result ensues, yes, that clichéd word.

honestly, i'm not a good talker. nor can i read the atmosphere. let alone people's mind. strangers, acquaintances, they might just be the same to me, i'm clueless about them.

and as day passes, when so much thoughts has piled up, the whole thing just feels so complicated. it feels like you are so lost when you discover so much stuff beyond your comprehension which you were so oblivious to before you didn't even know such things even existed.

it asphyxiates you.

sleepyhead

2010-11-02T23:59:00.002+09:00

i don't know why, but since the new sem started, i felt as if i've turned so much older, i mean by stamina. i easily feel tired and there must be a day in a week (excluding the weekends) where i can't escape from stay tied on the bed for almost 12 hours. and it's weekdays we're talking about here.

and that still doesn't cut short the amount of sleep i never intended to have during class.

at times like these, people will say, you lack exercise!

and i cringe at the whole truthfulness of it...

but what bothers me more than the above is how i can easily be in a dream. or what i thought is a dream. perhaps it's only my mind flying off somewhere else especially when this occurs in the middle of a class, but what i'm sure is, it's tiring! the purpose of getting sleep is to get rest, yet what you get after sleep is getting even more tired.

and even more frustrating is i can't recall what the dream was about. perhaps, some of the fragments are still left in the memories but it only last for seconds the moment you wake up, and suddenly it vanishes into thin air. at lucky times, i could remember one or two characters in the dream though.

and recently i just noticed how the book i'm currently read affects the dream i have. the other day when i read a short story about vomiting, i had this dream in which i feel so nauseous and somehow it linked to how i actually vomited all what i ate the previous night. stupid, right? but that really made me fell unwell for a few days. and i just finished reading a novel about indian society, and i dreamed something very related to it. i told ya, i can't remember my dream, but only the feelings linger which i can't easily grasp or properly translate into words.

talking about books, lately i'm so hooked to them, perhaps it's a seasonal thing, but it still puts me in such delight for the fact i actually finished 3 novel in only a few weeks just recently. they indeed had jumped in the queue as i'm still in the middle of reading 'children' currently. yosh, i'll finish that too soon! and when i feel like it, perhaps i'll review that a bit. well, i'm eager to finish it coz i'm looking forward to read another book (or more exciting, buy it for myself) which i had once leafed through a few pages of it some time ago in the bookstore-a novel told from the eyes of a cat. it's a classic work i guess and reading it in its original language is ever more tempting...

this reminds me when we were having our SPM exam week where others were cooping themselves with textbooks and kept leafing through their notes, i jauntily read a few novels i divulged from my buddies' room which i found just to my liking.yes, this only means i'm actually in a period where apparently we're very busy....

p/s: only about 2 weeks b4 the interview for the universities, zenbu umaku ikimasu you ni~

confidence zero

2010-10-29T01:41:00.000+09:00

well, at least that's what i think of my current state

sometimes i put the blame on experience coz for the very existence of it, we are afraid of things we probably should not, like how it could made us recall of unpleasant memories relating to it.

and i hate that feeling when you want it but left hesitating to take the next step.

but, like people say, experience's the best teacher.

maa ne..

in less than a month or more precisely in only 3 weeks, i'll be facing an interview that's determine my next stage of life. ok, i make it sounds like everything is on stake here, but really somehow it indeed is.

and i'm nowhere near prepared.

from my experience, interview's are not my best moment. but still, on that precarious moment, i am judged. so convenient! hahahaha, i'm purely laughing over myself here.

and from my experience, i can see the old pattern is going on a rerun. yeah, i'm addicted to watching drama again, as expected. searching for the root of the problem, it's not exactly my uncontrolled obsession, it's more of a repulsion towards my true obligation-school. oh yeah, i'm fully informed that people would say school is so delightful, a memory they would cherish forever, but see, it's only valuable when it has become memories. so, should i say keep on striving for the sake i could look back at this memories and smile?

another random stuff but never fail to keep lingering on the space of my mind : i need class on interpersonal skill. oh please, i can't live without other people but then i have no idea how to deal with them or even how to deal with myself. tch.

zenbu umaku ikimasu you ni.

and lastly, more random thing. i'm nearing the end of the second decade of my life, and i just feel like making a wishlist.
-a new watch - the one that has served me for more than 2 years just got broken
-a new wallet
-a drinking bottle -and someone promised to get me one for my birthday :D
-dove chocolates
-getting into the university of my choice
-a proper set of stationeries
-watching flumpool and weaver's concert
-a new version denshijisho
-travelling to US

+some others remain untyped

how should i organize?

2010-10-11T02:22:00.003+09:00

ok, currently there's quite a few things running at my mind that are only waiting to be flowing out through the tips of my fingers. i don't know where should i start or where should i end. this is something that occurs so often i guess that explains why i rarely get to have any entry done. a muchakucha entry would be useless, won't it?

ok, we start with stuff related to words and books.

after finished with 'ahiru to kamo no coin locker' the other day, i embarked on my second challenge with isaka kotaro's work. this time it's a compilation of short stories-Children. nevertheless, when i've gone a part through it, i discover those stories are somehow related to each other. and for this book, i just found how i really enjoy reading his narration, possibly owing to the first person view that he adopts which enables the reader feels like actually participating in the story. and while still unfinished, i got attracted to another novel. this time, it's haruki murakami-the translated one. well, quite a famous name but i haven't got the chance to read his yet-aside from reading a few pages from bookstore some time before. so, when mph made a promotion of 20% off on any book for this weekend, i got myself one-The Wind-up Bird Chronicle. not surprisingly, it's the same 1st person view. perhaps most japanese authors just love this style. not for me to comment coz i've only read a few works from them. back to the novel i just bought, based on the first few pages, it proves to be interesting. this would make my desire to get his original work-as always with the excuse of improving my nihongo-grows stronger. only wish my financial state will grow as strong though.

there adds another book waiting to be read.

and actually, recently i was itching to write about how i can be so disturbed with language error-be it spelling or grammar. it's the same for english or bahasa melayu. i mean, it is understandable if it sometimes inevitably occurs due to carelessness, but then if it does happen so often in a text, it almost seems that the person who wrote it just doesn't care. i mean, supposedly they have learned for nearly a lifetime and you still don't get the sense of the correct conduct of the language? don't you feel it's quite impolite to the readers who are giving their attention. indeed, i might not be in my place to say anything coz i can't escape making errors too, but i do give my effort into reviewing what i already wrote and check for any error. that way, i can curb them down as many as i could in the future by studying the pattern where i do have mistake the most.

and also i hate it when i want to recall a word and it just would not resurface. i've been stuck with this one particular word describing what i feel like the above. urgh, just what's that word?

btw, the btn we went through during the past week was ok. i did learn something, or more correctly my opinion from before is strengthened. i couldn't say much coz "we are not to reach a conclusion before we manage to grasp the situation from every angles and aspects available". in short, for what i know at the moment is certainly not sufficient enough to allow me to have my say. it won't be fair for any persons/entities involved as i could easily overlook them. for what is true and what is wrong and what i want to believe in requires my effort to understand them in full depth. any people in the world are capable of manipulating others for their own interest, so for not being a victim, no matter how much hassle it cost us, 'to think' is indispensable. so, when i am still and silent, it's not that i do not care like a sloth, it's solely because i haven't yet gotten past the 'thinking' stage.

but then, thinking is so mendoukusai, ne?

well, that is more the case when you got more enjoyable thing to get your mind so engrossed. i can't deny the fact i've passed a bit the gate of obsession when it comes to my favourite music. as the name suggests, entertainment does entertain!

and so finally, tomorrow school starts. yosh, another one semester left to be endured!!

the angst comes like a storm

2010-09-28T23:11:00.001+09:00

plausibly the reason why i barely got to post any entry lately

it's not good to perpetuate such a bad feeling down in writing, right? as the Nac Mac Feegles in my favourite Tiffany Aching series assert, writing lasts for eternity, so its scary. or more accurately, i can't quite put what exactly my feeling is at the moment. they are ceaselessly in turbulence.

at times, i could feel like crying for no relevant reason, but at times i could be extra excited. mood swing?

so, better if i wait until everything calms down and i can think clearly so as to avoid any misunderstanding or whatever mistake i might slip.

so, is this what people call 'teenage angst'? well, i'm still in my teens for a few more months.

Flumpool and Weaver really do serve as a very delightful placebo nevertheless.

i wish i could overcome whatever worry that are haunting my relatively big head. it is just so extremely unsettling. when i thought i should go to the root of the problem, i don't even know what the problem is. am i just having anxiety unnecessarily? or do i actually yearn for somebody to just understand? poor thing i never know how to reach out. even if i send out the SOS signal, i know not what to response when help actually comes. what a troublesome self. urgh, it feels pathetic to realize how pathetic myself is.

breathe in....... breathe out............................ breathe in....... breathe out............................

may i gain inner peace for eternity, amin~

that was a nice one

2010-09-17T00:15:00.001+09:00

Hari Raya was.... ok

well, i discovered my dad's photography tools have indeed increased where practically now we can have our own mini studio anywhere.

i'm not exaggerating.

which also means a good thing, coz i yet to take pictures asked by sensei. nevertheless, school won't start until the next 4 days. there's still time, hehehe

so, unlike what i expected, this time my dad didn't take many days off for Raya so by last Monday we were already back home. so, what my bro and i planned was to go raya by ourselves down to Johor. 3 houses cleared!

meeting relatives is a good thing once in a while. it goes without saying though. and another good thing was our journey didn't take that long, thank goodness there wasn't any heavy traffic jam. might be faster if it was my dad's Honda Accord but that's out of question. one more good thing is, travelling in a car without your parents means you can have music of your own choice. as loud as you want.

i'm so glad i didn't forget to bring my Flumpool cd on board! now, that is really money not wasted. i could play it multiple times along the journey. oh, Ryuuta, your voice is really delightful to the ears along with such great music you guys play. kimochi ha todoiteruyo!! and what a nice feeling when you get to brag about artist you love so much to someone new. and he didn't complain which means he do not hate it. yeay!

now, i'm waiting for my copy of Weaver's cd, then i can play it while cruising on the car. i bet he won't say no to this one. their music is just fabulous! even if none of what is said can be understood, music still is enjoyable for anyone, right. but i gotta say, weaver's lyrics are really nice and for someone proficient in nihongo, theirs are pretty easy to catch, and there, you'll be dazed. Kawabe(the lyric writer in Weaver), i really respect you for this. aaa, even now, i'm playing 'Kanseitou' on repeat.

and i ate too much... i'm worried for the medical check up tomorrow. going to Danga Bay again was indeed fun. never though i would ride on that bicycle again, and this altogether with a total of 6 adults!

random

2010-09-09T07:52:00.002+09:00

it's still dark out there, i'm writing this on half past 6 in the morning

yesterday, instead of getting my shower in the bathroom, i took mine under the rain

am so excited to get past half of the book i'm reading now. Has-sensei, owari made ganbarimasuyo!

my Weaver fever just ran up so high after discovering a fan community for them
oooh, kawabe, i really want to see you doing live performance in front of my eyes

and making a new friend who's solely responsible for making me so drunk on Weaver

am so so excited to wait for my copy of their album!! aah, the PV of 'Kanseitou' is ever making me more impatient~

and a current update on kazuki's translated blog really made up my morning!

i dunno know for how many times i keep playing Kimi no Todoke video, oh ryuuta, you really make me melt

i just started rereading Maou Juvenile Remix manga. quite surprised to see how fast i can read it now compared to when i bought those nearly half a year ago, yes, go iman!

currently trying to list up the goi that's apparently going to be beneficial for us who's taking JLPT lvl 1 (it's called N1 now?) thanks for those who's cooperating, i appreciate it! and i'm still open for those who's want to offer their help in this too

kinda regret for leaving flumpool fourbond at shah alam. otherwise, i could flail while reading it. haven't read the latter half yet.

just so pissed off with the internet at this house. is what my dad says true that in very near future we're using fibre optic? he says it's the yellow line i can see on the telekom wireline by the road. i want to believe it but i dunno.... please spare me from this so-infuriating-internet speed.

and wimax does not really alleviate my irritation as it only have fast speed for a few days every month before reverting back to its usual snail-pace

which explains why till now i haven't watched Hotaru no Hikari episode 9

oh Buchouu, i miss you~~~~~

facebook recently is getting annoying, what's with all the hype regarding it? and how more people are just tagging hari raya cards instead of personally sending it. even sms are better, at least there's still that personal feeling as in "to ....."

but then, facebook is my second most frequented website.

and i actually found empty hari raya cards while doing spring cleaning the other day. but then i don't know where my mom put those. zannen~

and really happy to receive one all the way from nihon. thanks a lot Aqilah-senpai!! it's beside this notebook now.

am relieved my dad doesn't seem yet to get obsessed of making ketupat for this Raya. or else i have to weave them like usual. well, i don't care if i only have to do 5 of them but when it comes to 50, iya da!!

i dunno why but the Raya mode just hasn't yet dawned on me. oh, is it tomorrow? i'm screwed, haven't packed my bag yet. thankfully we're only going back to johor until sunday.

my brother is bugging (is this the right word in this case?) me as for what we would do next one week we got free coz my dad's working. i just hope my mom won't be in the way of us enjoying this duration as we like.

on this 18th, it's open house at Farah's house, really looking forward to this, please let me go!

and so much of my friends are already leaving Malaysia. it's okay iman, only half a year left......

and oh yeah, after that, definitely i'll go watch Flumpool and Weaver!!! if only they know how they got such a huge fan out here always waiting for the day to watch them live or even to get to know them personally. they're amazing people (at least, in my eyes), that's why. also among the reasons i'm so eager learning nihongo every single day and why i thrived through everyday though engineering in japanese is just so damn tough (sorry, is that foul word?)

~~when i finish writing this, it's still quite dark outside.~~ when i edited it, it's already (gosh, i forgot what's the antonym for dark!) ok, numerically, it's already 7.

spring cleaning

2010-09-07T02:40:00.001+09:00

is what i'm expected to do this holiday.

and as anyone knows, i'm such a person who just don't bother much with cleaning though i don't appreciate my place to be dirty, but i don't see much points in getting myself tired from arranging stuff and so on, in short to be so damn neat. people might say it's all cluttered but as long as i know where my stuffs are, that's enough. urm, can't deny i always forget where i put my belongings-forgetful me.

well, the point here is, the raya holiday has started!!

and it's 2-weeks (yeaaa, for JAD students, u perfectly know why this is such a heavenly thing). and because my dad does not take so much extra days off for this raya, i actually got about a week with nothing to do (but unfortunately only my dad is working for next week which left me and my mom at home, and ammar in this case).

so, what i already has in my head is the following:

-of coz, raya is a time to eat delicious stuffs
-visiting friends' houses that are nearby-i could ask for someone's help in this
-finishing the novel i borrowed from has-sensei (already halfway now :D)
-typing down the kotoba for 1kyuu preparation and gathering as much help to get this project take off
-start working on the math exercises given by ueno-sensei for saitama daigaku written exam

-learn to cook a dish at least??

ok, i should not set my goals too much or it'll only be unaccomplished like how it often did before.

and, no matter how many times i watched flumpool's latest pv, ryuuta never fails to mesmerize me, aaahhh~

君に届けたい～～

the expression by this boy is priceless

different clocks

2010-08-28T01:11:00.000+09:00

for me, the 5-day-off starts today~ well, not actually i can be fully relieved, they won't leave us without any homeworks and reports, and on top of that, after the holiday's over, i would have an exam for a subject i've yet to know exactly what it is about. okay, i'm working on that.

so, for the first day of this holiday, i originally intended to have iftar with my housemates somewhere out but due to some misunderstanding in my part, i eventually ended up following my parents to my grandma's place. thanks to the ride, i get more than enough sleep. at this moment, it's 12 midnight rite now and i'm awake in front of this comp.

but somehow, despite having adequate sleep during the day, i'm actually kinda sleepy. normally it's the high time now, with all the louds and noise at the utility room with my friends, sometimes playing games together. but here, it's a 180 degree change. everything's so quiet. everyone's already asleep. even the creaking sound of the fan is somewhat deafening. unlike all the young bloods i often mingle in, clearly old folks just have a different clock. perhaps this is just how they have their leisurely pace, early night and early morning and whatever come after.

calm and serene?

well, i might just imagine how i would spend my old days, relaxed and away from the hustle and bustle of the life i'm used to now.

yeah, let this environment give a push inside myself, a revitalization and a boost to give more effort into what i'm doing now. kakougaku, please be friendly to me from now on! and oh, the idea of having to learn thermodynamics in 2 weeks after eid holiday is a bit frightening, but i'll just do my best! let eveything go smoothly, amin~~

at a loss for word

2010-08-27T02:53:00.000+09:00

every so often i'll be stuck in a situation where i could not find what to say when actually i would really love to have a chat with someone. alas, i'll have no clue and end up in taciturnity. indeed, people say silence is wisdom but it is through words that people can reach an understanding and deepen their bonds. words are powerful enough it can translate what actually is felt deep inside and deliver it straight to the others. it's because feelings and emotions are such intangible things, they need some medium to travel.

but then, when words are that powerful, it can turn out to be fearful and dangerous. be it orally or written. when uttered by the two lips, it can be intimidating as the accompanying tone could be scary, it can reverberate in the mind, like a haunting chant. however, words that are written down just last, leaving an unfading proof making it just as frightening.

even while knowing that, it's inevitable to just blurt out something we do not really mean. only to end up feeling so bad once realizing what a mistake the tongue has done. or even what the fingers has just thoughtlessly lined down. an array of words that might just hurt someone unknowingly.

or is that really the case?

only people so selfless would think that. perhaps what do we really care about is how others perceive us after making that blunder on words. would they look down on us? would they go away? did i just make myself a fool?

nevertheless, by saying nothing, would that not make that a mistake just the same?

if only God would grant me the grand art of weaving words the right way at the right time..... amin~

satiated

2010-08-21T00:06:00.000+09:00

one of the things that ramadhan teaches you is gratitude.

somehow when you are so blessed with such a comfortable environment, all of the things that come along are taken for granted, thus we forget, and sought for more.

and more and more.

until you learn that what you actually need is nothing more but that little of something. and then you realize, by far you've deceived yourself for getting the surplus in order to satisfy yourself, oh what a waste when there's always somebody else who are deprived of all those and would be more than delighted to have it. when was the last time i feel satiated with food so simple and only a handful of it? (gosh, how gluttonous i was). and it does indeed make me happy.

Alhamdulillah~

and to look around, i can't deny the existence of all those things that would let me down every now and then, but there's also things that can paint up the smile on my face and also put my heart in felicity. to be glad to actually be alive. and it's all thanks to Him. He's the one giving life in each of us and the whole complete world we're living in. even when facing all those challenges, it's inevitable to be exhausted, but you can always know you're doing this for a reason and your final destination. nevertheless, for our heart is a delicate thing yet it's easy enough to be pleased by things of our fancy, He has scattered all those around very beautifully. you just can't escape the admiration and to be brimmed with sheer gratefulness.

Subhanallah~

thank you Allah, i'm happy and blissed~

p/s: the last 2 weeks of 'nihon keizai to keiei' class was so enjoyable and kept my heart leaping undoubtedly. i know i can make it through the other ordeals be it the 3 weeks of an apparently mind-boggling and mentally tormenting class, iman, ganbare!!

and retrospectively, JAD is not actually that bad after all, anyone agree?

the price of patience

2010-08-19T00:07:00.000+09:00

for how many longer could i hold this up inside....

ganbare!!

everyone, have a blessed ramadhan!

感動的！

2010-08-08T00:28:00.001+09:00

it's a saturday. with a lot of stories.

the luncheon

truly happy we could gather and hang out with our dear buddy faseeha before she would so far away from us. and the day we spent together was simply memorable. the lunch which we took so much trouble just to find the right place, and the laughter shared in the process. somehow, we ended up somewhere totally contradicting to the initial condition of the search-affordable for plain students like us. we went italian.

so funny how we barged in like some sort of an awkward party acting haughty and yes naturally, to choose something from the menu took time. or how to eat some warm bread when it's served with vinegar and something-god-knows-what. well, the pasta was not all that bad, though some bad choice makes it go below our expectation a lil bit. nevertheless, the whole party of 6 managed to enjoy ourselves. really sorry to the other patrons of the restaurant did we bother them with our noise and sheer excitement.

pastas involved : spaghetti, linguine, angel hair
also pizzas and calzones

too bad it can make you feel full when not even half has finished

the last airbender

due to some blunders in my part, i mistook that my brother would come along too. good thing izmier was there to fill in the space (waste not my rm13 spent). so, excluding me, rifqi and him were to watch 2 movies today. if i were to review it all here, might me troublesome. so my overall impression would be, good effects and i could see how interesting the original story would be (i didn't watch the animation series). but somehow perhaps it's just difficult to cram it in a movie even for the very first part of it. it's just that my mood was not that aroused while watching it compared to the other movies i've watched recently. however it does makes you curious for the next part. but for this type of movie, maybe not as much as i anticipate the sequel for darren shan's vampire's assistant.

what goes around comes around!

this might some weird occurrence to me but it does leave a deep impression inside. it happened when we were walking our way back from the ktm station. we were totally in a rush before maghrib runs out of time. more than usual i took quicker and bigger steps. but then, i didn't know since when but someone was calling us from our behind.

"stop! stop! don't run! i'm no robber"

that caught me in a daze. and he goes on further with some super-rapid-pace explaining his whole situations till the moment he stumble across us on that road. i was just so perplexed to give any response especially when he said, "really sorry to ask you this this favour, but i'm really not trying to rob you, even if i do, hit me". still in bewildered state but i somehow pity him for being stuck in that desperateness so eventually i just handed the last 3 ringgit i have in my wallet. combined with izmier and rifqi's part, it did not even make up to the whole meager amount he needed but he looked rather pleased. then we instantly left him behind and took even bigger pace to catch it in time when something really unexpected totally caught me speechless. for the second time, someone called for us.

"free taxi, free taxi"

the remaining few hundred meters home were of ease that not even a couple of minutes passed before we arrived. and not even late for maghrib prayer, alhamdulillah~

....and my fandom

kenichi matsuyama to star in the adaptation of 'usagi drop'-one manga i love to read for its simplicity and cuteness. well, there's quite a story in it too. that very cute lil girl in it is the same girl from the drama 'Mother'-a drama worth watching for its story and suspense despite being a slow one

and watching buchou today really my day a level brighter. buchou~~~!!! hotaru is just so adorable while buchou is hot like always

fluffy cottony clouds

2010-08-04T21:24:00.001+09:00

oh, how i love seeing clouds from the above. really, it can make you feel like to frolic on it, jumping up and down, living the child side of you though you know that's entirely impossible as it only consists of vapours. but yeah, they remind you a lot of cotton candies, offering colours from white, silver, grey and yellow sometimes, depending on where the sun is.

what made me recall all these is our visit to MAS hangar at Subang where we could explore the planes, the BIG planes which were there for maintenance. the ones i usually board were of the smaller ones, but to see the bigger ones is so much different. i mean, it's just HUGE. from the floor to the tip of the topmost of the tail equals the height of a multiple-storey building. and the one i saw was just the boeing 747, not even the jumbo A380. reminds you how tiny humans really are.

Airplanes are just amazing.

and today, instead of doing my report on the visit, i ended up wiki-ing more about planes. wikipedia is just magnificent, isn't it? recollecting my previous visit to Halim Mazmin facility in Langkawi during high school, Diamond DA aircrafts is still as desirable as it was when i first saw it. it's a light aircraft usually used by pilot school but also commonly popular for private use. who wouldn't like the idea of possessing own aircraft? how wonderful it is to surf through the clouds and witnessing the whole breathtaking scenery, eyebird view! what more, if it were to be with someone dear by your side.(*^▽^*) i'd love taking lessons to pilot it or just simply waits the other person to bring me around.... there, there, i afraid the fantasy would grow even wilder if i continue this on

beautiful, isn't he? (hoho, i know people often refer as 'she', but i'm a grown-up healthy girl :P)

by the way, i just found what a lavish fathers could give his child as a memorable present. an experience being behind the 'wheels' of those huge Boeing 777.

as expected, the report is not even a word done. now i better start off!

SS day 1

2010-08-02T21:34:00.001+09:00

like he said,

"counting the months"

okay, perhaps that's the exact thing i've been doing all the while. with that, we have a lot to be done from now on, like the application forms and so on

what should i write on it? hmmm, i'll let the neurons do their work on that sooner or later. i know i can't get off just by writing that i'm applying there because sensei told me to. hmmm....

but, the most important thing, what we have at the present time is the Short Semester. when the others are apparently enjoying their holiday, here we are working our brain intensively. life's not all joy and pleasure, i know that. but i'm wondering, seeing that the first subject we are focusing on have a lot to do with chemistry stuff, do i just have little chemistry with those? it's not like i have zero interest in it, but i realize it took me only a short while before it put me into slumber. dame da naa... iman, ganbare!

tomorrow would be an exciting one nonetheless. we are to visit Malaysia Airlines' place. supposedly the place where they keep their planes. i love big things. they're just impressive as to see how actually such a huge structure could send people through the sky. in my guess, they gonna show us the engine part or so. i'll try my best to get the best experience out of it. but i kinda fear when i would be frustrated were i to be clueless in front of these amazing stuff we gonna see. there, there, obviously there's a lot more i gotta learn.

reminds me how ignorant i am.

and also, apparently tomorrow the day where i would confirm my fear all the while, please2, no matter how the exam result would turn out, don't let it eat yourself, ok?

to walk and to shop

2010-07-28T22:32:00.001+09:00

too tired to write anything....

have spent approx more than a month worth of scholarship

the joy of shopping is irresistible, though it comes together with sore feet.

and today, the urge to shop managed to suppress itself when i get myself too exhausted after trying to be on balance on the impossible two thin slice of metals under my feet on the so-very-not-smooth ice rink. now, that's what we call exercise. but at that moment, i miss my time with the companion i went with the last time i attempted ice-skating, Hide-kun, tasukete~~ however, skating made me realize something. the sheer strenuousness you have to persevere along the way and the patience that just might burst at any time whilst seeing own self so helpless and so slow in catching up with the rest, it all just feel familiar. yeah, just like when struggling in my studies. but i know i just have to go on, no matter how arduous it is. nevertheless, this pathetic self always weakly succumb to pain and give up every once in a while. sometimes i just feel so sorry for myself.

iman, ganbatte.

ちょっと、話変わったけど、結果は何でも、覚悟してね。

absolutely gotta thanks syara for the last few days, it was exciting!

different person, different taste

2010-07-25T00:25:00.001+09:00

yes, now the exam's over, i felt like such an extremely huge load off my back.... i'm alive!

just the other day, we bumped into a situation where a lost squirrel got trapped in our house and freaked every each member of the house. and guess what, we live in 10th floor and there's no sign of any trees around up above there. and after numerous shouts and screams, the matter was safely resolved where it involved the owner of the mentioned creature himself and some unexpected reward. and what spiced it up was that they actually got heated up over the concerned man. well, at the beginning, i was left clueless but to see my housemates all excited. i didn't get to see the man at first but from what i heard, he's just good-looking-the reason they were all hyped up.

and at the end of the squirrel ordeal, i did manage to see him once. and.... more than being mesmerized by him, to see that in fact, me and housemates just have our own definitions in finding things fancy is enough to intrigue me. okay, eventually i just say he's like any other guy who i would just pass by without thinking of stealing a glance. well, obviously different case for my dearie housemates. but today, i guess things might just be the other way round.

i watched 'inception'.

not the first time, but today i'm captured by a figure i see on screen. and he never once escaped my sight throughout the movie. it's the 'arthur' character played by joseph gordon levitt. for this one, i'm sure the other girls in my house would just say, "nothing much" but it still can't avoid me from admiring how good looking this guy, especially when i notice so much of a resemblance between him and my adored japanese actor-kubozuka yosuke. of coz, not fully when one is japanese while the other is american. oh yea, i love those eyes. and if only levitt have the same kind of voice as kubozuka, i'm perfectly melted. nevertheless, i can assure the aura they exude off while on screen are equally captivating.

just some random pictures i found on net. undeniably the looks my eyes would stuck on

oh, 'the sorcerer's apprentice' was not bad too. at least it kept me awake despite being a midnight movie

hisashiburi ne?

2010-07-20T18:56:00.001+09:00

contrary to what i thought, this time, i ended up deserting my blog for this exam period.

okay

-not entirely okay-

but i anticipate a thing that would put me in so much bliss. i guess that would compensate the grief due to the exam. and natsuki-chan was really cute~~ little do i regret going to bon odori too this year amidst this vital time.

korekaramo ganbarimasu!!!

really want to munch on subway at the moment

Onychophagia

2010-07-09T20:17:00.000+09:00

not like i know how to pronounce that word.

what i know is that i've succumbed to it long before than i could remember.

thanks to it, my nails are always short. in fact verry short.

okay, enough of wiki read for today.

less than a week away before my sem exam start. i'm praying everyone could deliver their best, i'm hoping we all could pull it off together with if not astounding, at least results we can at least proud of.

despite the pressuring time-span.

yes, actually panic attacks. again.

but yet, what i'm hoping here is some coincidence so trivial to the most important matter at the moment.

イマン、勉強しなさい！！

p/s: shin-chan, is saitama that nice?

ありがとう先生

2010-07-07T13:49:00.001+09:00

ハス先生、今日落ち込んでる私を笑わせてくれてありがとう。

なんか当てる分もあるね

-it's that time again-

2010-06-30T19:52:00.000+09:00

apparently, june marks the lowest entry count. well, a lot happened, but more often than not, it's either i'm too occupied with other things or simply the internet would not cooperate with me. the later just plain irritating.

happy birthday to the whole lot who were born in June. there're several cases i realize it's particular someone's birthday and badly i want to wish the person's concerned but got no chance doing it.

my sentences are getting ever more complicated.

oh, it's TOIEC this saturday. what a great thing if i were to get full mark. but mistakes are utterly inevitable.

and the title of this entry applies to what would happen in less than a fortnight away.

SEMESTER EXAM

with inadequate studying, chased by many other academical obligations and haunted by unavoidable worries.

may everything goes all right.............. ~amin~

p/s: i sense an increase in blog post very soon............

ついてる、ついてる

2010-06-27T01:31:00.001+09:00

okay, amidst time like now, i really like to sing along the song 'Dear God' from 'avenged sevenfold'. well, for the reason it has such line like this:

"i'm lonely and TIRED~...."

ummmm, undeniably the current period we're enduring right now might be among the toughest times as a student in this so great program of JAD. with only less than 3 weeks away from the big and important final exam, yet the load of works never seems to be lighter even a bit. and due to own very fault, you didn't bother to equip yourself first with sufficient studying beforehand because having fun is more inviting to do, so you ended up panicking when it's only the eleventh hour. adding more to that, we have to worry about which university we should apply to ensure we would get the best of it, it's more agitating when the one of your choice does not seem to be approved by the sensei who believe there are another one meant for you.

to the point you want to say, perhaps you've reached own limit you have no strength left to take another step.

疲れた！！

is what i want to say, but somehow, it seems someone made me realise i better not say that aloud or even as a silent whisper. might be funny but according to him, it could mean another thing,

「憑かれたー」=possessed

see, if it's said too frequent, the later meaning might just come true....

and i learnt this:

疲れてても

「ついてるついてる＾＾」

って言うのがいいらしい。

-even if you're tired, better to say "i'm hanging on, hanging on"-

^-^

thanks Kawabe-kun!

and yes, Kawabe-kun, you look so smart in a suit there! XD *oh someone, would you make me happy giving me their upcoming new album due to be released by this August?*

craving for pasta satiated + marvellous days

2010-06-20T11:34:00.000+09:00

at last, after few weeks been craving for pasta, i finally have it for myself. yummy!

well, that was only the beginning of a blasting friday nite-the last nite i got chance spending time with goda-oniisan.

.
.
.
.

oops, i think i got late reaction with that fact............

to be continued

the middle of the year, the middle of semester

2010-06-05T00:15:00.001+09:00

so much of a good thing that the program i'm in now complies with the japan calendar, it just differs to most local universities, yeah, we're indeed NOT IN HOLIDAY.... in fact, we're really in the middle of the semester now

so, you can just imagine how bustling it is.. and just today, we had 2 tests.

not something i would like to talk about.

まあ、失敗は成功のもとでしょう。。。　

そして、洋平さんも言ったんじゃん、「あきらめたら、そこで試合終了」

ok, i should get my spirits up!

we went in the workshop this week. thank goodness it's not as hot as i thought. we haven't finished with the lathing, the rest will be completed by next week but i wonder do we have enough time for that... btw, it was funny when it just happened exactly the same like with the previous group as a friend of mine had told me, to see our TA so restless waiting for our sensei.

and someone made me very happy in the middle of the week too. never thought he would do that far just for us. that was so kind of him to remember about us and send stuff all the way from there. that just adds more to the gratitude i'm owing him now. how i wish i can already fly over there and see all these wonderful people~

for university fair tomorrow, i'm wishing everything to go well, really hope i could gather all the information i need, like sensei said, this is our sole chance of having direct interaction with people of our prospective universities. nihongo jouzu ni shaberaremasuyouni.....

and something relating to origami gave me a giggle today XP people can be so cute sometimes~

the passing days (photos updated!)

2010-05-27T08:18:00.003+09:00

seems like this month my entry count is a lil bit less than usual but it doesn't mean nothing much is going on, in contrast there's a lot of stuff that i got my hands tied. but amidst that, there're also some happy and unexpected days~
like how we ended up touring KL

getting butterfly on my finger

and saw schools of fishes and lots of other creatures at aquaria

feasting on a scrumptylicious ice-cream

riding on the rollercoaster which was totally out of plan

buying a new blouse totally way above my regular price range

simple daily surprises such as having naan as lunch

or getting our circuit working after numbers of times it had failed

missed our bus home and hitched a ride on our beloved sensei's car, and he treated us for cheezy wedges

the 30seconds trailer of flumpool's new song (gosh, how i want that upcoming single sooo much)

or the sudden development of the drama i've been watching

or reading some blog posts that just touch my heart(as explained here)

okay, supposedly the most of the above are only captions for photos i intend to put up there but the internet just won't be nice to me from the day before yesterday when i first wrote this post. so, whenever condition allows it, i'll rethink on updating this again.
photos updated!!

but yeah, thanks to a whole lot of people who just make my life brighter. everyday is full of challenges, bearing it with all the sweet memories, we all can make it through together~

p/s: this blog somehow is like a rollercoaster ride

turbulent

2010-05-20T20:19:00.003+09:00

point 1:

so many things have broken, literally and metaphorically. due to the overwhelming works we have, it has gone past my physical limit and so does my mental limit and i'm still trying my best to strain myself to last each day. too many stuff to cram in my head, my patience has no more to spare. to say honestly, maybe it's not too much, perhaps it's just me who's so stupid to utilise my time. facing that truth, my spirit breaks yet again. the condition of the house which need repairs and has long not mended till now, i'm irritated and no one just cares.

point 2:

to learn and to learn, you've immersed into the deeper world of unknown. to know more means to discover the whole lot bigger counterpart of what you don't know. sometimes i wonder just how oblivious i am, i'm practically the same as knowing nothing. well, people say ignorance is bliss, but isn't it frustrating? so often to be buckled with the sense of insecurity, like at any moment you could just disappear and perish just because you know absolutely nothing. yet to know how the world works, yet to know how to make a mark on this world, yet to know a whole lot of other things.

point 3:

i'm clueless about a species called 'homo sapien'. if only we can check the meter of humans' feeling like in analog meter or digital ones. it's too much a puzzle, figuring it out has become an endless game. i prefer not it can just be read like a book, words are confusing just the same. to reach and connect and to understand is just so damn hard. to sincerely say out loud of what's in the head can hardly be actually done. too afraid, too scared of the plausible unwanted outcome. or is it simply coz i'm just damn selfish? when i thought i'm thinking about others, it's only about me in the end. yeah, the reckless me. never i am the altruist coz i'm a narcissist.

perhaps, i'm being ungrateful, only ungrateful people complain. nonetheless to have so much questions in life is just part of being human, isn't it?

-done spewing out part of what has been held in by far, proceeding to sleep therapy-

snapped!

2010-05-20T10:45:00.002+09:00

not totally in a good mood

jaa!

lethargic-happy-voiceless

2010-05-19T01:15:00.000+09:00

okay, the third one was near lie. i still got my voice but it's nowhere near my normal voice.

hayaku naorimasuyouni

too much to say yet i don't know how to put it.

and this sleepiness kicks in too hard, i'm hoping i can be genki soon. (oh my, i'm losing the words, i'm mixing whatever in my head now)

briefly, there's so much people that have my gratitude at this moment, yes, i'm so damn happy

despite the exhausting days we have to go through. undoubtedly, no one can escape from being fatigue at this rate.

jaa, will be updating soon where the conditions are more favourable.

THANKS A LOTTT! I LOVE YOU GUYS!! real life can be so delightful at times~~

one wishlist cleared!

2010-05-09T14:17:00.001+09:00

in fact, there were just too many good stuffs happened yesterday, one of them being getting something i've coveting so much all this while.

to put yesterday chronologically, it started at 8 a.m. saturday at 8 a.m!! if it's a usual saturday i would be still lying on bed. but yesterday was a Saturday with an agenda. i was actually going for a KL tour! hahaha, for nearly 20 years i've lived that's quite a first time doing so. actually i was just tagging along when a friend of mine invited me to join them. so there we goes, head count: 14. i know that's quite a large party but it was exciting nonetheless. and tht's the first time i ever hanged out with junior girls. a lot of them too. and the whole purpose of the tour is to let our TAs enjoy KL. in short, we're the tourist guides and also fellow interpreters for them :P

so, what's there to show in kl? ok, that pretty put me in a bind too. i mean, what i know about places in kl only limited to its shopping malls and such. so, for our dear tourists, there's at least something else we could show. there's a lot, isn't it?

so we ended up going to national museum and butterfly garden. :D

okay, perhaps museum is out of my knowledge range, but they currently hold an exhibition about coffins. quite interesting actually. but poor them, there's no japanese in the descriptions so i don't think they could understand it so much. and after that brief stop at the museum, we actually enjoyed our time in the butterfly garden. what i could think of actually was that's a good place for dating (okay, i know i'm lame). though the numerous number of butterflies can creep you out, it's still beautiful and fascinating. i got one on my finger! that is after it stopped on goda-san's arm and just stayed there. is his body emanating sweet honey or what?

moving on to the next venue, we came into a family whose 2 daughters are so cute~~~ i didn't get bored playing with the baby, it's simply too adorable despite the fact i'm not actually fond of kids. but this one is irresistible. oh emily, have a good time in malaysia though i'm sure you won't remember your time here after all.

and then, the main attraction of its all, KLCC. hahaha, i don't know for how many times i've stepped in there this year. and i'm just absorbed in kinokuniya just like always. but yesterday, it was so exciting, other than buying a book i've been looking all these while, i also discover someone else that could relate to my predilection. yea, frankly i didn't bother with him before, but we have such common interest it's such a delight. shimoyama-san, i'll remember that recommendation of yours, i'll read it for sure! i'll be waiting for the day i could actually read all those isaka koutarou's novels. i've been attracted to his works when i watched the movie adaptations from his novels. man, that's quite a style! i'm sure the novels are even more penetrating than the adaptations. now i really hope my nihongo is already so damn well enough to be able to read those.

and last but not least, petaling street and central market. that really gave me a giggle. i'm wondering what purpose does they come here all the way from japan for. they ended up buying a whole lot of anime dvds and very little of anything else. at least, they got to experience durian. i really think it's rare to find someone who would like it coz none of them does. and also what poor luck to buy a defected good it's broken a while after the purchase. and we walked and walked and walked it was already nearing dusk.

yea, time to return. yet, while the rest were heading home, i made a detour to fulfill my objective of the day and went to midvalley. however, it seems like what i want to do can't be done after all. instead, i found what has long been in my wishlist, and an affordable one at that. oh my, i've really been spoiling myself...

with name engraved :D but at least, someone understands this one fancy of mine

but looking at yesterday, now i really really want a camera!!!

it's epic!

2010-05-04T20:41:00.001+09:00

the first movie i watched in May, and it's just fantastic~~!!!

it's Kick Ass!!

okay, honestly, i'll say i had not the slightest interest to watch it when looking at that title. i mean, it just sounds like rubbish. and even prior entering the cineplex, when i at least knew it's a story about someone who is a superhero wannabe, i simply thought it's a parody of all those superhero stories we've known. in short, i got zero expectation.

and then i watched it.

gosh, it's only the first minute and i already laughed my heart out. it's just too hilarious. and then the story starts, featuring a super-regular guy with no special ability or whatsoever and quite absorbed in the comic world. and his name's dave. while there's a lot of story talking about courage, in this movie, this guy probably shows a WHOLE LOT of it. to make himself a superhero while he has no powers or anything close just because there's just nobody else who would be one. of coz, who would???

and suddenly, he turns into someone in green suit appearing in streets. what does he think? cosplaying??? i thought just how stupid this story would go, alas the story really does lie on realisticity(did i just make up this word? :P). his first attempt to do justice and something really notorious happens. i bet there's no cinema that would be quiet during this scene. to not be a spoiler, i'll just say while he indeed succeed in stopping the bad doing he saw, in return, due to his own zero-superhero-skill, he took the toll of it. yeah, this is getting interesting.

and parallel to dave's story, there's another story about dad and daughter who seems like they're having their own scheme, very mysterious but creepy as well. and both story progresses and up to a point, they intersect each other and everything falls into place.

this movie is never short of moments where i would be taken aback, especially when nicholas cage first appears with some awkward mustache. i didn't know he's among the cast! i guess his acting here is just superb as anywhere else.

youtube plays its role in the movie as well.

to make a full review of it would be troublesome, in short i'll say the plot is really great, and every casts live up their characters amazingly well. and unlike any superhero movie, it's just realistic (for me at least). action scenes, not bad, and if i could remember there's a moment with an applause from whole hall. language-wise, if you consider 'fuck' as no foul word, then it's rather clean. hahaha, i guess that word just appear in the script at 20seconds frequency?? may be gruesome at times, or simply you feel just how that cute girl can ruthlessly stab people to death?? but, she's still cute anyway.

oh, and that super-regular-guy-dave eventually turns a lot more attractive by the end of the story.

i just love this image i found on the net

perhaps, this would be the best movie for 2010, it just has a lasting impression it still doesn't disappear until today from when i watched it. i wouldn't mind watching it again. ummm, but i figure sunway pyramid is not the best venue to watch it after all. they got such a bad hall for watching a movie it's so steep 5 rows from the front are totally goner.

疲れたんですね~

2010-04-27T02:38:00.000+09:00

先生にそう言われたんだ、そして、「昨日、お疲れ様です」

まあ、それもあるし、でも、そんな授業はぜんぜんまだ慣れていないよ！！慣れられねぇよ。できるだけ寝ないように頑張ったのに、５分も経ってないで、もう目を閉じてしまった。仕方ないにゃ～

でも、結局、悲しいよ、このままじゃ。もう４週間目だよ。毎回もこうなると、ダメだよ。やっぱり、私、ダメだなぁ。授業の内容も分からないし、宿題のほうも進んでないし、毎日も、怠けたり。

バカじゃない？

blah, enough complaining as if you're the only one having difficult times. there are others suffering even worse more than you could plausibly imagine. be grateful enough of what you have, there's always others who would be more than glad to be in your place. think of that, and no more grumbles.

an excerpt from a song i like from radwimps, Yumebanchi:

叶えた夢の数を数えよう叶わない夢は誰かがきっとどこかで．．．

｢僕がたっていることはきっと誰かの願ってる場所で

誰かがたっている場所がきっと僕の望む場所で｣
誰かがきっと今僕にとっての夢を叶えてくれている

僕もきっと誰かにとっての夢の叶えている

はい、先生、これからも頑張りますよ、僕をちゃんと見てよ、今度寝ないよ！！

yea, i know this is kind of pointless, but i just need to blurt this out somewhere. this selfish narcissistic me can no longer hold more of this depressing thoughts and these negative auras are asphyxiating.

are we safe?

2010-04-20T20:07:00.001+09:00

i remembered reading a hadith concerning about 'iman'. part of it mentions that one is not with complete 'iman' when he steals.

undoubtedly, that damned person(s) who broke in our house yesterday in our absence and ransacked all over, taking away precious properties from our possession was no way in a state of full 'iman', if he still had some it left. what he did was only an unthoughtful action, causing people none other than vex and misery. simply unforgivable! has he no guilt-conscience for what he did? has he not thought the sadness he brought?? and also the grudge the people he stole from would bear? how can he live through that?? no matter how desperate life can be, it still doesn't justify the terrible means he use.

while i'm extremely grateful my precious notebook was somehow saved (the presentation i dread was indeed a blessing in disguise), but i'm also in anguish for the loss suffered by my friends. imagine, to have properly lock the house and keeping all precious stuff securely in place, yet to return home and found them completely gone. as if all those efforts we made to secure things safe were completely to no use. what is the meaning of this?? only to what extend do the padlocks, grills and every available locks could protect us? if we are so much marked like this (it seems the perpetrator knows there are 5 notebooks to target, they desperately searched the house for the other 2 they couldn't find, a complete mess), the fleeting question now is how safe can we actually feel? it might actually a relief they only targeted the notebooks, indeed it's very aggravating considering how expensive they cost us, but it's a truly scary thought if one would go as far as breaking other people house searching for more than that-something too precious as a girl for instance.

ya Allah, please secure us from any adversities, and put our heart in ease, only to you whom we can seek protection.

void

2010-04-18T03:22:00.001+09:00

sometimes i think i understand why the pieces done by painters or sculptors or poets are simply incomprehensible

are they by chance afraid of being fully exposed? yet wanting to be understood by others, but there's just some thing you don't want people to discover. they want to express themselves so people take note of them, but fear the reaction being opposite of what is expected.

something like that.

i think i'm shrouded with worries of the perception of others. is it right? or is it wrong? indeed, it can leave you miserable. no one want to be hated, thus finding ways to be liked. to know others and make them part of your life, so you could be alive.

yet, getting connected is a wholesome task.

people are complicated creatures, that's why.

i'd rather people to voice out what's in their heads, and to do that myself would be wonderful too. but, it's simply difficult. when i thought i'm being considerate of others, it seems like in the end, it's all about me. can i be more selfish than that?

and it's not like the world revolves around me, is it?

but it certainly is, in 'my' world. in that tiny world of 'mine'. i ballooned up in 'my' whole world suppressing others to the walls.

what am i? a narcissist??

a narcissist with a void in here, wishing it to be filled. and knows not how. to feel so small among the giant of others, longing for something to feel sheltered in ease. to much desires and and demands to be satiated. the eyes sunk down in insecurity. the feared darkness closing in.

and there's silence.

lalala

2010-04-16T00:44:00.000+09:00

my premonition eventually came to reality.

i indeed cannot hold myself from all these temptations. seems like i'm falling deeper day by day....

and school? maa, it just gets busier and i'm far from tuning myself to that. all that empty talk of getting myself working extra hard for this year.

please... i'm so scared now. scared of jeopardizing my own golden opportunity due to my own recklessness.

it's not like i'm not aware how terrible would it were i to mess the whole thing i have before me now, but i'm just plain weak. weak mind. weak soul. weak self.

i despise this kind of self.

zenbu umaku ikimasu you ni

math failure

2010-04-09T23:51:00.001+09:00

finally, one hectic week of school over. no, tht's not a week, definitely that felt like a month! i'm exhausted with all the workloads. they just don't do it the usual way where the first week would be much lax, they go straight to the contents of every each subjects while we plainly have no idea of everything in it. if we're compared to a car, we're no normal car, if not, to go straight to gear 5 is utterly impossible.

yet, once the last class of the week came to its end, instead of lying in my lovely bed, my leg brought me to kl. yeah, kl! specifically klcc, my venue: kinokuniya.

while originally i planned to go there next week, for the pc fair as well, the thing i've ordered just have to arrive on this very week. well, i'm a person with little patience. straight away, i went and now i'm in cloud nine. hehehehe. to have something you covet so much finally in your hand is such an ecstasy.

yea, yea, i know the reports and homeworks are chasing me, but let me relish in this moment first. aaahhhh~~~

go, go iman!!! you've spent so much to be lazing around. you've overspent again..... when i thought i would stop at that book i want so much, kinokuniya just have to do this offer which i just wish they had already started it in march. every rm30 spent earns you a stamp, 9 stamps give you rm30 worth of book. let's just say you spend rm270 and you get book worth rm30 for free. i'd like that. if only i know they would do this in april, i'd delay buying all that manga-gosh, i spent over 200 on them alone. i can nearly have all the 9 stamps that way. oh, and while thinking that, i made a blunder today. dunno why, but i guess the hectic week really affects my head, i miscalculated, i ended up wasting over rm10 when i didn't even have to. aiya, tht can make up my 3 days lunch. what a waste, what a waste. sorry ueno-sensei, i can't even count properly, so much to struggle in your math class.

nonetheless, bookstores are simply dangerous.

oh, bought another novel despite having a number of others in queue, waiting for the day i would read them. this time, i bought 'the winner stands alone' by paulo coelho. his writing is amazing, i still remember reading 'the alchemist' and so mesmerized by the story. language-wise, indeed it made me want to put it down at times but i enjoyed it so much. the story is just great i ended up giving it as a farewell gift to someone when i had nothing else better in my sight. i wonder if he would read it though. would be good if he does.

now, i'm so lethargic. still well for blogging, but report? i think.....

Idealistic Mind of an Absolute Neurotic

winter makes me hungry

first post of 2012

.... (didn't even know i unposted this)

Sleepless in the futon

We made gyoza! +verbal descriptions

wish i have this now

practising english

It's fall!!

days without solitude

diary - calendar - phone

sentimental

the tohoku +a bit of hokkaido train trip (a tecchan travellogue)

what a gloomy post in the first week of ramadan

the end of exam note

i didn't see this coming!

Baskin robbins a.k.a sa-tiwan

2 consecutive weekends at home

Thus the 8th weekend

Borborygmus

when my tongue got frozen

the 7th weekend : yokohama (part one)

and we were taught the wrong one all along

note before the end of may

what i learned

day 40 -sushi-

to be honest

GW '11

The apps

The entry that supposed to be a week ago

too tired to type

the last nite

心細い

十夜

from zero to unknown

inexplicable

iro iro

a stupid situation

3月9日 -sangatsu kokonoka-

thus, the remaining 3 weeks

nineteen hundred

photo express

みんな、おつかれ！

so, what's next?

nice timing!!

there'll be no more of this in nihon (really?)

of studying and eating and fangirling

coz words are powerful

what you give, you get back?

patience is the key

日本に行く前に、しておきたいこと

christmas+new year holiday

the done list 2010

singapore was awesome!!

CRIB

alhamdulillah

on edge

ありふれてる言葉だけど

let me do this in 10 minutes

nearing defeat

海+月=?

grumbles

what i had on Saturday

courage undetected

やる気、上がれ！！

there's a lot to wish for

more reading list

sleepyhead

confidence zero

how should i organize?

the angst comes like a storm

that was a nice one

random

spring cleaning

different clocks

at a loss for word

satiated

the price of patience

感動的！

fluffy cottony clouds